I've been lurking here for a few months now & have been fully onto the CRL diet for about 8 weeks - I went back to Induction for 2 weeks to start with. I'm at 30-35 net carbs now. I weigh every morning. I'm following the CRL recommendations pretty closely, without dairy, using Fitday daily & eating primarily meat & veggies with plenty of fat. I'm still about 100lbs overweight but Adele invited me to go ahead and join in, so here I am. :)

I dropped dairy on 4/20 after finding this site & reading about food addiction. The changes in my body have been amazing to me. One of the biggest changes has been the elimination of those intense, awful, my-head-will-explode-if-I-don't-eat-SUGARSUGARSUGAR cravings. I never understood before how people managed those. (Now I know that most of them don't!)

I'm about to turn 31, and I'm married with 3 boys ages 8 (almost 9), 7, & 5. They all have various food allergies/sensitivities and my 7yo has OCD about food, so it can be a challenge cooking for all of us at the same time.

I have never had a body that fit on any graph or chart so I really don't know what to put as a goal weight. This is about being healthy and active, taking care of myself so I can take care of the people I love, enjoying my kids, keeping up with the housework, etc. - things that are challenging when you're morbidly obese. I'm 5'7. My most fit adult weight ever was 180 - I ran, lifted, & swam, & my body fat % was in the teens - so that's in my head, but when I get there I expect the actual number will be different. Hopefully by that point a healthy weight will be more self-evident. Shorter term goals include being able to shop for clothes in a regular store (vs. a plus-sized store) and being able to sleep on my stomach. :)

I'm not sure what else to write...I could go on for pages! I'm on Sue Ellen's list too & they do weekly check-ins on Fridays so I'll probably post weekly updates here too. Guess I'll see you then. :)

-Sara.
274.5 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

Last Edited on 1-Jul-2008 8:30 AM

Weekly check-in time. :) I'm down 2.5lbs for the week. I had a couple days of stomach illness & didn't get a lot of calories in, so my weight dropped fast, & now that I'm eating again it's come back up. I know once my body is convinced it's not starving, my weight will head right back down again. (And it's still a good loss for the week.)

I have definitely seen that if I under-eat, even a little, after a few days I will be HUNGRY and end up more than making up for that deficit. That doesn't happen if I've been sick, but I have really struggled with fatigue the last few days, so I increased my calories and carbs (read: veggies) a bit & I am feeling so much better today. Not 100% but able to do my normal daily activities.

I got my grocery shopping done yesterday. I was running low on, well, everything. I'm all stocked up again now & that's a good feeling. :) I'd been a little worried about not having enough, but I have at least a week's worth of meat & eggs, & probably 2-3 weeks of veggies now (lots of frozen), plus half a gallon of EVOO, a new 1lb jar of virgin coconut oil, and the jar of meat drippings I'm saving in the fridge. I found pork side at Meijer's yesterday - been checking there for a couple weeks now & the kept being out of it - so I tried some last night, yum (and this is HEALTHY??) and about the same price as the no-sugar bacon (with nitrates) I'd been buying there. And look at all that lovely clean fat to pour in my jar! I do wish it was cut just a little thinner though, but I'm sure I'll get used to it.

I also got some decaf coffee to drink black. I've been cutting back on the stevia (I get migraines from artificial sweeteners) in my herbal tea, and keep finding myself cranky about my tea not being sweet enough, so I thought maybe it would be easier just to switch. I haven't had coffee for years. I don't tolerate caffeine well at all & even decaf seemed to give me headaches, so I went to tea. I'm hoping it was the cream & sugar causing me problems, but if this doesn't work I can try decaf black or green tea. Did you know black coffee tastes exactly like it smells? I had no idea; I always thought it tasted like coffee candy. ;) The decaf whole beans all had artificial flavors added at Meijer's so I bought a small tin of ground. Then I went to Gordon's (bulk food store) for my frozen veggies & they decaf beans there - ah well, next time.

I feel like I'm really getting a handle on this way of eating. At first I was forever running to fitday - what if I eat zucchini instead of broccoli? Can I swap out okra for pumpkin? What can I add to boost my fiber? I have a much better idea now of how much of what I need to eat in a day. I don't really plan out my meals in advance, but I have thawed meat in the fridge & veggies ready to go, so all I have to do is put it together. I ate some of the pork side already, and in a bit I'll go warm up some okra, and I have hamburger waiting for me, and 1/4 head of cabbage I should eat today before it gets any wiltier, so that just leaves another veggie "serving" (I'm coming to think of a 10oz package of frozen veg as one serving!) & I'll check my fitday numbers & figure out how much of what that should be. Since I'm a stay-at-home-mom I don't have much need for pre-packed ready-to-go food. I do plan to cook a few meals & freeze them though, for just-in-case, and because I ended up sending hubby out for Chinese food while I was sick & not up to cooking anything. (Egg drop soup & beef-broccoli.) I have 5lbs of ground beef & 4 heads of cabbage in the fridge so I can cook up a whole bunch of that & freeze it in meal-sized portions. We don't have a microwave so it doesn't save me any cooking time, but when you're sick it's a lot easier to just toss something in the oven to warm it up, rather than have to chop veggies & stand over the stove. I need to make some chicken broth too - that egg drop soup was great, & it's easy to make at home - but I'm out of chicken. (How'd that happen??) I wonder if the soup freezes?

It's such a relief to finally feel like I'm in control of my eating. Cravings are at a minimum, I never have to be hungry, the food tastes good, and I'm melting. It's not always easy or convenient, but it is so very, very worth it. I just hope I don't muck this up.

-Sara.
276.5 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

Yesterday for some reason I kept looking at the peanut butter jar. Boy a big spoonful of peanut butter sure sounded good. I dealt with that; I don't eat peanut butter, and even if it was a nut I've had my 3 nut servings for the week, and I had my food planned out, and there's no reason for me to eat that. And if I truly do want some I can go next week & pick up some almond butter. But it kept niggling at me. Mmmm, peanut butter.

And you know what you can do with peanut butter? You can make peanut butter pie. I just found a "recipe" for making whipped cream with coconut milk - mmmm, peanut butter & coconut whipped cream. And I could do this, or this, or this, and wouldn't that taste good?

OK, no peanut butter, but that was annoying.

Then I burned my hand on the skillet making my hamburger-and-cabbage. It's not as bad this morning as I thought it was going to be, but it was quite painful and red and blistered up a little, and I had no gauze or anything to bandage it with, and dh was at work & so was our car, so I just had to deal with it until he got home & I could go to the store.

DH got home & had not picked up the prescriptions I asked him to get. OK, not so big, I have to go get my gauze & stuff anyway. He worked nights all week & is back to days for the weekend so he was tired and cranky. Our neighbors were going nuts with fireworks - it looked like our street was fogged in, there was so much smoke in the air! - and my 5yo was NOT handling it well. Loud noises hurt his ears & scare him, so every time one went off he would cover his ears and scream and cry. And they were going off a LOT. So I decided, at 10pm, to take my 3 rowdy boys to the pharmacy with me, thinking we could just go through the drive-thru & give Daddy 20 mins or so of relative peace.

Daddy decided to come along at the last minute because he wanted to get fast food. Of course everyone got a snack or treat - except me. I wanted ice cream, but knew I wouldn't actually get any because it would make me feel horrible. I thought about getting a burger but after my batch of hamburger-and-cabbage it wasn't appealing. What I really wanted, I decided, was hot wings from Pizza Hut. Yum. But even those, without breading, without ranch dressing, without pizza or breadsticks, I know, will make my weight bounce at least 2lbs. And even at the time, even REALLY wanting SOMETHING, it wasn't worth that. Besides I have gotten in my head that *maybe* I can lose 30lbs before my birthday on the 12th, and wouldn't that be a nice present for myself? And I definitely won't make that if I eat out. (This might be a little silly, and it's not something I have much control over, and I'm not going to change anything about my food to "try" to lose that weight faster - that would only backfire.)

When we got home I realized I had forgotten to get the bandages for my burned hand. Which meant I either had to go back out at 11pm just so I can get my own needs taken care of, or get through Saturday with a burned hand, nothing to bandage it with, and no car.

Crossed arms, stampy feet, rolling eyes, fuming mad, railing at the unfairness of it all, glorious tantrum.

I posted a rant on the Atkins list & in the midst of that realized I am probably getting ready to ovulate, & my hormones (as well as fatigue from illness & lack of sleep, and stress, and pain) were probably contributing to all of this. I have been anovulatory for a very long time but last month I think I managed it as I had a slight temp spike plus an actual luteal phase. I was a mess the day before my cycle started and ended up over-eating fat & protein by about 300 calories that day, though I did "at least" keep my carbs down & ate all legal foods.

In the end I decided since I would be awake for at least an hour before I settled down enough to sleep, I might as well go to the store & get my bandages, and hey, I might as well buy some chicken wings while I'm at it, & the grocery store is closer than the pharmacy.

I did go to the store, I got what I needed, chicken wings and quarters were on sale so I bought some - I was out of chicken - and then I came home & went to bed. Without eating.

This all seems very far away today. I know that last night I was furious, I know the feelings were intense, and I clearly remember the desire to put my neighbor's fireworks in inappropriate places. But it all seems a little surreal.

My hand is not nearly as bad today as I thought it would be, but as it turns out my son hurt his arm & I needed those bandages for him today.

I'm eating pork today. The chicken is not calling me & I think that was more about finding SOMETHING I could "treat" myself with than what the actual food was, but I'll save it for tomorrow. I have no-sugar-no-crap hot sauce & it doesn't take much if you put it on after the chicken is cooked.

After yesterday I really think it would be best if I get through my birthday without any sort of food celebration. I am hoping I can go see a movie - I'd like to see The Hulk with Edward Norton, I like him a lot. An afternoon out, without children or husband (or food), might be just the thing.

Oh, and I was rewarded for my abstinence with a 1lb loss this morning. :)

-Sara.
275.5 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

Last Edited on 5-Jul-2008 10:40 AM

Welcome aboard Sara...

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 11+ years
Maintaining at goal 8+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

We have all continued to fight a stomach bug off and on, and I had a couple days of just not wanting to eat at all, and one day when I did not eat much (~500 cals) but besides that one day I did keep my fat & calories up, got good protein, and even got in some veggies. So my fitday might not look like I've made the *best* choices this week (lots of tomato juice & coconut, not enough veg) but I managed it as well as I could & I think keeping my numbers up helped me feel better faster. You know, we had a great winter illness-wise, but now it seems we're catching everything going around, and having a heck of a time getting rid of it!

I checked out a couple of gyms this week. Walking in to a new place full of strangers is a BIG DEAL for me; I've been thinking about this for probably a month & just finally went and looked. I've been thinking about buying equipment to use at home but I really like the idea of the gym; my place, my time, for taking care of my body. The staff at the first place made me feel very welcomed and encouraged, but the second place (bored, indifferent staff) has a pool - not sure yet.

My first tour guide asked me lots of questions about why I was there, what I was looking for. I told him I started a diet a few months ago & have done well with that, and now I'm ready to start strength training.

He said, "That's great! That's the way to do it. Put the diet first, and everything else will follow." (grins)

I find vinegar and stevia are slowly phasing themselves out. It's not something I'm doing deliberately, I just don't feel much "need" for them. I am still using a fair amount of hot sauce, which is made with vinegar. I found a "green sauce" recipe on a paleo site that is just oil with pureed herbs, and I think a fresh jalapeno in that would be great. I'm drinking decaf black coffee & starting to enjoy it (vs. "That's not as bad as I thought it would be.") It doesn't seem to be causing me problems.

As of this morning I have lost 30.5 lbs since 4/20. Happy birthday to me! I'm not doing any sort of food treat. I *am* going to see that movie next week and maybe get myself that gym membership. :)

-Sara.
272.5 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

Gotta run,

-Sara
271 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

I did increase my veggies some (35-40 net carbs) & I think I may have knocked myself out of ketosis; I was HUNGRY despite adequate calories, and had some cravings. I'm coming back down to 30-35, but I will try to make sure I get at least 30 - I was struggling a bit to get that much in. Adele suggested adding in denser veggies like carrots, & that has really helped me hit those good numbers. It takes a whooooole lot of broccoli & cabbage to make 30 net carbs!

I had a slip this week, Wednesday. I was slicing up a pear for my son & it seemed very soft & I thought it might have spoiled. DH wasn't here so I tried a bite to check. I planned to taste & then spit it out & rinse my mouth, but hang it all, I chewed & swallowed. I did stop right there & had nothing else off-plan. I have made my kids paleo cookies & muffins without so much as wanting to lick the batter off my fingers, but those fresh blueberries are oh-so-tempting.

I would like to include some fruit in my plan but I am gradually working toward Gold Standard & serious anti-yeasting. (I'd have to look on my Fitday to tell you the last time I opened a bottle of vinegar, and I thought that was going to be a real struggle to give up. I still use hot sauce & mustard though & those are both vinegar-based, and I'm still using dried spices, so I have a little ways to go.) I HOPE to be able to add fruit back once I get close/to goal, but I know I'll have to do that very carefully & with my eyes open to what it does to my body. And that is a far long way away, anyway; I need to be focusing on what I'm doing now and not worrying about what I might or might not do in a year...or two...or more...

It was a busy & stressful week in the other areas of my life, and that's not going to be getting better anytime soon. I don't know that I'd use the term 'anchored' ... but this way of eating certainly gives me a feeling of control - if nothing else, I have total control over what I'm putting in my mouth. (Yes, including that pear.)

-Sara.
270 today
----------
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

As of yesterday I was down 4.5lbs for the week - a nice loss, but it's because I haven't been eating enough of anything. I wrote yesterday that once I start eating again I know my weight will bounce up while my metabolism re-adjusts - and as expected, after eating more yesterday I am up a pound today.

We are in serious financial trouble and I didn't have money for groceries this week so we have been scraping. Between that, seasonal allergies & sinus issues, and worrying myself sick over how we're going to pay the mortgage, prescriptions, etc. - I haven't been eating.

Nor have I been using Fitday, knowing the numbers would be too low - irony is fun. I'll start it again today, even if it's not "perfect."

I have, at least, been weighing every moring, and am avoiding grains, sugar, dairy, & fruit.

When I did Atkins before I included a good amount of soy & peanuts, which I have avoided since April. I have several pounds of soybeans and soy protein powder which I have been eating in the last week to boost my protein. I gave that several days & watched for symptoms - no weight spike, no cravings.

I also have a big tub of regular mayo which I've eaten the last few days, again watching for symptoms, and so far not seeing any, unless today's bounce is one. But as I said, yesterday is the first day I've eaten close to adequate calories, so... I'll keep watching. I am low on olive oil & out of coconut. I do have a jar of meat drippings in my fridge & will use that too, when I can, and will keep adding to it, as I can.

I anticipate adding peanuts/peanut butter next week as another cheap source of fat & protein, again watching for cravings/binge behavior/weight spikes/other symptoms. With the peanuts & soy I can get one meal, plus eggs for another meal - it will cut back quite a lot on my grocery budget.

I am terrified that my body won't tolerate these foods, that they'll turn into gateway foods, that I'm about to head back down into the abyss. I KNOW these are not ideal foods for my body. I know I'm taking a risk including them. But the alternatives, as I see them now, are a) eat only meat, pure fat, eggs, & veggies, but don't eat nearly enough of them; or b) switch to low cal low fat i.e. beans & rice - which would certainly be cheaper, but is the absolute worst option for my body & my health. Well, possibly excepting the M&Ms and Pepsi diet, though I'm not entirely sure how much difference it would make at this point. ;)

So my hope, my plan, is to use these foods to supplement my healthy protein & fat until I can get back fully onto the foods my body loves. I hope if I can't continue to lose with these foods I can at least maintain what I have lost. I wish I could give a definite date by which I'll drop these foods again but I have no idea how long this is going to last; we're in a deep hole & right now it's hard to see a way out.

My husband is the one with the spending problem. I'm sure I play my passive role in it, but he's an adult & I can't control his actions. I am not able to work due to the needs of my severely disabled son. Childcare for Michael starts at $20/hr and goes up, and I don't have a college degree & haven't worked in 10 years - I can't get a job that would pay enough to even cover his care, much less childcare for my other 2 boys, and bills besides. That's not taking into account the time off & flexible hours I'd need due to his frequent dr's visits (he currently sees 6 different specialists plus his regular ped) as well as his frequent illnesses (we average monthly ER visits due mostly to vomiting blood & dehydration - complications of his medical conditions).

My husband has had 2 strokes & is in kidney failure from uncontrolled diabetes. He cannot physically manage our son. Michael is about to turn 9, is 4'6 & weighs 90lbs, and functions at a 2yo level. We have no family in the state. I will spend the rest of my life taking care of him. I love him more than air and it breaks my heart to say these things, but that is the reality of our situation.

So. Here I am.

-Sara.
266.5 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

I was able to meet with a very kind soul this week who gave me meat and a whole container of beautiful pure pork fat. I am nearly out of olive oil & that is so expensive, but I can use the pork fat now instead. I have stopped using the soy to supplement my protein. I am so relieved to be able to stick with the foods I know my body loves, and stop worrying about how I'm going to react to the soy, mayo, & peanuts I thought I had to eat.

I had a what was probably a not-entirely-unpredictable slip on Sunday when I ate two muffins. After the first one I felt sick and queasy and awful. After a few hours that feeling wore off and then I went and ate another one, good grief. Aside from those I only ate a couple pieces of sausage, nothing else at all that day.

I am really struggling to get myself to eat enough with all this stress - it goes straight to my stomach, always has, and if I'm not actively queasy (or stuck in the bathroom!) then I simply don't want anything. And of course, worrying about money this way, it's easy to justify not eating - I'm saving that food. I need to make this a top priority; it is just as bad for me to eat too little as it is to eat too much. This is part of the process of learning to take care of myself.

I have committed to take a more active role in our finances & to stop wishing & hoping that somehow DH will take care of this himself. I have attempted this a few times in the past but quickly became overwhelmed & quit. I have found a local Debtors Anonymous group - did you know there was such a thing?? I didn't - and I'm reading their literature & am surprised by how much I identify with what they're saying. I'd have told you this is my husband's problem, not mine, but apparently I have my own issues to deal with too. The first step they suggest is to start keeping a spending log, writing down absolutely everything you spend, and I have started that. I know how much we have in the bank, I know what bills we've already paid and what else needs paid when. The cash, debit/credit card, & checkbook are all literally locked in a closet so we have to consciously decide to go get them before spending anything. These may seem like basic things, but they're big steps for Miss Passive here.

DH has agreed that spending is an addiction for him & says he will do what he needs to do to get us through this. I am hopeful that we can get through this, but it will be all about the doing, so we'll just have to see. Each and every day we're both going to have to get up and commit to sticking to our budget and only spending what we plan to spend.

It's surprisingly (to me, anyway) similar to being committed to this way of eating. Every day I get up and weigh myself - my daily commitment ritual, facing reality & keeping myself accountable. I'm adding to my morning ritual logging on to the bank web site & making sure my spending log matches up with their records. Every bite of food I put in my mouth is an opportunity to choose healthy or not -- every purchase we make is a choice to stay on plan or go off it. In either case, going off-plan would have serious long-term consequences.

I hope it's OK that I'm talking about this here, I know it's not strictly diet-related but I think this is going to be a big part of my story ... learning how to take care of myself, respect myself, and make sure my own needs are met - whether it's a need for healthy food, clothes that fit me, the roof over my head, or keeping what's under that roof neat and tidy ... This is about so much more than just not wanting to be fat anymore. I think this is the first time I really understood what people are talking about when they say that.

Thank you for listening.

-Sara.
265 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

Up a pound from last Friday. I'm doing better with getting in enough calories, but still not eating enough veggies most days. I'll keep working on it. Progress not perfection, right?

What a week it has been.

I found myself very angry yesterday. I needed my husband's help with moving some things and he was not physically able to do it. He has kidney disease due to uncontrolled diabetes, and he simply didn't have the strength & stamina to help, and I had to figure out how to do it alone.

I'm doing a whole lot of that lately, and it doesn't matter what I want or what I need, I just have to make do with what I have. Which, since this whole "taking care of myself" thing is new for me, has kind of been a running theme in my life.

Anyway that really pissed me off yesterday - not just that I had to move heavy things alone, but it brought up ... well, EVERYTHING I have to do alone ... and I was probably not the nicest person to be around for awhile. I ended up sitting outside by myself & calling my friend to vent at her. She has plenty of her own life troubles but was willing to just sit with me and listen. I guess anger is the easiest emotion to feel, a lot easier than fear (which I've had plenty of in the last two weeks) and let's not even talk about grief & sorrow.

But I think I managed that in a largely healthy way - probably not so much the stamping around & being snippy bits, but the not eating or otherwise medicating it away, and the reaching out to another human being - those bits, I think were good. (grins)

-Sara.
266.5 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

I am STILL struggling to eat enough calories & veggies. I get a significant amount of calories from fat on my veggies, so these go together. Getting very frustrated with myself. I know exactly what I need to do, I'm just not doing it. The other day I had my food all planned out, went in the kitchen & made my bedtime snack, which would bring my numbers up where they need to be, and woke up at 2am & realized I left it sitting on the stove top. Got up in the morning & there it was on the stove, plate & fork on the table - I got distracted & forgot to eat it. Good grief.

And because I'm not eating enough I'm dealing with hunger and cravings - sigh. Eat, girl, EAT!

I am doing better with this overall though. My averages are higher than they were. I got everything in yesterday, now just keep doing it.

I think part of this is that I'm spending so much energy on our financial issues. I have completely taken over that & have been, well, pretty frantic about it. It feels like such a huge responsibility and I've been so afraid of messing it up. I've tried to do this a few times in the past but that fear & ... how do you make overwhelmed a noun? Anyway, I can't do this 'perfectly,' and if I can't do it perfectly, well ... you know the rest.

It's getting better, though. I've found some real support, both emotional and practical, and it's helping. I'm starting to feel peace about this decision, starting to feel like this really is something I can manage. It won't be easy and it won't be fun and it'll never be perfect ... but I can do this. (Any of that sounding familiar?)

But it has taken over as my #1 Obsession. ;) I have to find a way to balance this, so I'm giving myself what I need on both fronts, and neither suffers for the other. Maybe that's not completely possible, but I can give it a shot. It's OK if (when!) I make mistakes & am not perfect. Maybe I can find "good enough."

-Sara.
263.5 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

I had it backwards at first & had a little rebellion when I thought I couldn't eat until the alarm went off. No. This is to remind me to eat if I'm NOT hungry. That little attitude adjustment has made a surprisingly big difference.

-Sara.
262 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

Last Edited on 23-Aug-2008 7:08 AM

Phew what a couple of weeks it has been.

DH is now officially on the transplant list for his kidney failure. Some of his family members are being tested to see if they're a match. We already know I'm not.

I have been cheating regularly. A bite here, a nibble there, a couple pieces of breaded chicken ... Leading with my emotions - apathy being a big one - as someone else here put it. I haven't had access to fitday so I don't know, but suspect I've been low on calories & definitely low on veggies. I'm up a few pounds and feeling bloated & tired, and have had unpleasant GI symptoms.

Part of this has been a convenience food issue. It's easier to grab some hot dogs or lunch meat and sit down with that instead of cooking hamburger and green beans. I need to start batch cooking so I always, always have something I can grab and eat without any preparation. I think I'm going to start keeping a cooked turkey or chicken in the fridge all the time. And fresh carrots & other veggies I can just pick up and eat whole, raw, plain.

I got back on 100% yesterday, wasn't able to do fitday but will start that again today. Gonna go check on that turkey in my fridge & see if I can put him in the oven.

-Sara.
265 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

Last Edited on 6-Sep-2008 8:25 AM

I spent the entire night in the ER with Michael (dehydration, IV fluids & meds, & observation after a seizure - he has epilepsy) and got through that without hitting the vending machines or otherwise cheating ... I was proud of myself for that. He is still sick & I may be heading back to Children's with him today; I'll make sure I take food with me this time. That is actually the 3rd night this week I didn't sleep at all. Matt ran to the store & when he gets back I'm going to fall over for awhile. But first I'll put a roast in my crock pot.

-Sara.
263 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk

I am getting back into the habit of using fitday (and planning my food for the day in advance) after not being able to. I have stuck with the plan of cooking a whole turkey or a big roast or whatever, so I always have meat ready to eat in the fridge, and that works well when hunger threatens. I've been eating raw celery & green beans with raw almond butter - which is divine, and oddly, less expensive than the roasted.

Gotta run,

-Sara.
259 today
high weight 350
re-start 4/20/08 at 303
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=sara%2Ebyk