My name is Elizabeth, and I have been reading the Lead with the Diet Forum for some time now. Debby, who used to be on one of my lowcarb lists told me about it a long while ago,and I have been reading it more often lately.

Back in 1999, I weighed about 170. I found atkins, and with tweaking, got down to 145 in 2000 shortly after I got married. I looked great, and believed I was close to goal. I actually looked better than several months before on my wedding day.

Then I kept hearing how I was eating was unhealthy and bad for me. So I started eating more fruits, grains, lean meats, taking cheat days and cheat weekends, etc.

Today I weighed myself, and I am 176 pounds. I am getting so sick and tired of not being able to lose. I have allergies to dairy, and fruit gives me problems as well. I don't have much energy, and when I do lose a pound or two, it comes right back.

After reading your forum off and on, and wanting to start my journey for many months now, I am to the point where I know deep down this is the only way for me to get to goal. I kept trying other tweaks, but nothing is working, and I am
to the point I need to get my eating back in line, and start seeing progress.

I started a fitday log and will post it once I have one week of days food logged. As of today i've been eating only meat, eggs, low carb veggies, olive oil, salt, pepper, lard, and black coffee. I am just so sick and tired of being overweight and sick and tired, and I know this will be a struggle, and probably even bigger struggle once I get to maintenance.

Right now, maintenance seems possible but I am having a hard time picturing it. I do know I can't go back to having treats here and there, cheat days, the occasional "treat" as it just doesn't work.

I am so thankful Debby sent me the link to this site, and while I wished I had started to get serious sooner, I think it has taken me to sink this far down for it to really hit me that this is what I must do. I know how tough this is going to be, and yet I have no idea how tough. I want to badly to feel healthy again and to not be overweight anymore. Like I said before, i'm so tired and sick of being this way.

I think one of the biggest obstacles in the beginning is to stop "listening" to other forums and groups. I've come to realize that I need to stick to what is going to work.

Thank you again, I am glad to have reached this point, and starting on my journey.

--Elizabeth

Last Edited bluefizzure on 23-May-2006 4:06 PM

Welcome to the message board Elizabeth.

Let’s get you rolling on the losing trail before you worry too much about maintenance. This is like a cross-country move, on foot, from New York City to Los Angeles. We’ll give you a lot of ideas about how to live more peacefully in LA when you get there, fair enough?

In my opinion, anyone who already acknowledges they have trouble with dairy and fruit almost certainly needs to avoid grains too, especially wheat, and almost certainly has yeast issues in the overall picture. While I don’t necessarily recommend climbing back onto the wagon quite as drastically as you are right now, I can understand why you are going about it this way. In some senses at least it is easier and sometimes noticeably more effective this way.

Please please please be ever-careful of the all-or-nothing streak we all seem to bring to this. If my hunch is correct, you are gonna feel like a million bucks in 3-5 days, and while sure that’s wonderful, what you will have to guard against is your life-long pattern of eventually BARGAINING your way away from that, sometime between next week and the year 2015-20, y’know? Bargaining is how you waggled yourself off every time before. It’s how I kept turning success into failure myself, I am not the pot pointing to the kettle here.

While you are sick and tired of being sick and tired now, eventually you will be sick and tired of being so stringent with your eating, and you will WANT and feel and be told you could and should, you deserve to loosen up.

We’ll get to all that later, if you stay the course. But there, in a nutshell, is how you get what you want. You figure out, slowly, exactly what your body thrives on and you give that to your body. You don’t bargain anymore, even when you want to. And your feelings and the people around you all get over it.

Keep us posted, Elizabeth. I’ll be waiting for that “I feel like a million bucks” post.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

I was down to 174 yesterday morning when I weighed (2 pounds down from 176). I remembered I didn't weigh when I was walking out the door fully dressed. This is something I want to do every morning.

I have noticed i'm VERY hungry the last couple of days.

Hmmm.... a cross country trip from New York to LA on foot.. that sounds about right, LOL... I'm focusing on that now instead of maintenance.

I have problems with a lot of foods... wheat, fruit, dairy, though I didn't think I had a problem with rice before. It did thoroughly constipate me, so that is enough to make me want to avoid! All grains and fruit make me tired shortly after eating.

The foods i'm eating now (meat, natural fats, veggies, eggs) are the only ones that don't cause me problems, and also I actually like the fact that I have quite a bit of different foods to eat, yet am limited. I don't know why, but things are so much more black and white (coffee = black, no wondering about cream, and artificial sweetener). When I go shopping my trip is much shorter.

I am on my guard on the "feel like a million bucks" in 3-5 days, which will be anywhere from today through Saturday. I know this is something I must reall watch, as I know what you're saying all too well. Bargaining is why I went from @ 145 back to 176.

I know too I will get to the point where the meat & veggies i'm eating will become boring. And that will be a struggle. I need to keep remembering why I'm doing this, and how I don't want to go back up again, and feeling crappy every day.

I know what a struggle too it will be at get togethers, and I need to have a plan. My husband is extremely supportive of this, but I know that even if he wasn't, in the end, every minute of the day, it's ME in the driver's seat. And that is a struggle to grasp.

I liked the phrase "I eat foods that love me back." I've loved foods that don't love me back, in fact hate me viciously.

So this isn't my "feel like a million bucks" post yet, lol... but I wanted to check in.

Elizabeth

Last Edited bluefizzure on 25-May-2006 4:47 AM

IMO, that’s your dragon, fighting sleep. You’re not REALLY meaning we’re not gonna eat fill-in-the-blank anymore.

I have problems with a lot of foods... wheat, fruit, dairy, though I didn't think I had a problem with rice before. It did thoroughly constipate me, so that is enough to make me want to avoid! All grains and fruit make me tired shortly after eating.

Elizabeth, I could have written that myself 10-12 years ago. What finally occurred to me in what really DID turn out to be my “click moment” was that I acknowledged all that you just said, and a little more. I saw the big single picture of my dieting life, how I kept TRYING to find ways to wrangle stuff back into my diet (at that point I wouldn’t have used to word bargainl), and my click moment was really a giant “what if?” question to myself. What if I just decided to NEVER eat any of that again? What if I just made sure I ALWAYS had the right stuff on hand, lots of it, and just ate that and said what I had to say and did what I had to do in every situation to just MAKE that happen.” (At the moment I had this click moment, I was poised at the open refrigerator door, with a spoon in one hand and a jar of all natural peanut butter in the other. I was beginning the bargaining process AGAIN, via my ACTIONS, not my thought processes, after finally really finding out why I hadn’t been able to lose on lowcarb up until that point.)

I know what a struggle too it will be at get togethers, and I need to have a plan.

Best plan: Always Eat First. Eat “defensively”. Go into situations with a full tank. You can think straight with a belly full of gold standard foods and a sleepy dragon. You can’t think or behave straight when you are hungry and your dragon is awake and thrashing.

My husband is extremely supportive of this, but I know that even if he wasn't, in the end, every minute of the day, it's ME in the driver's seat. And that is a struggle to grasp.

No matter how wonderful your husband is, he will not ALWAYS be extremely supportive of this. He’s gonna have to go through a bit of a journey with this too, assuming you stay with it. We’ll talk lots more about that later. That stuff starts happening somewhere in the vicinity of Salt Lake City, okay?

I liked the phrase "I eat foods that love me back." I've loved foods that don't love me back, in fact hate me viciously.

This is not unlike any other tangled abusive relationship. Not unlike a woman who keeps going back to an abusive mate. See all the parallels?

So this isn't my "feel like a million bucks" post yet, lol... but I wanted to check in.

Talk about YOUR body, YOUR food, YOUR journey, the good, the bad and the ugly, YOUR truths, try to temper your inner drama queen (in all of us, I have an insatiable one too) and state your facts. Hopefully we will all learn and grow, and Connie (if she ever comes back, lol) and I might be able to help you just a little bit, first to separate your body and your emotions, and then slowly help you get your body and your life meshing into one simpler, saner package. I hope that makes some sense Elizabeth.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

You're correct about the journey my husband will be doing with me eating this way. As well as others. Tonight when we went grocery shopping, he said, don't you want to stock up on Michelina's salisbury and potato frozen dinners? And this was at the end of the shopping trip, and I calmly told him no, I don't eat those anymore. And he said, well last week when you were doing something different, you could eat those. Which he is right. It just made me think... okay, he's right, i've "played the field" in the diet world.

I mentioned to my mom this week that i'm eating meat and veggies, and she said, that's not healthy, and I said, what's not healthy about meat & veggies? She said you need fruit and grains. I just calmly told her that well, that is fine, but that doesn't change how I eat.

It's interesting what you said about having an abusive mate. In high school and college, I dated a guy who was really nice at first, but once I got to know him, realized he was verbally abusive. He didn't think he was, and I dated him for 5 years. So I see the parallels i've had with food to this.

Tonight when I was going through the produce aisle, I felt like I was looking for the diamonds in the rough. The diamonds being veggies, and the rough being the potatoes, fruit, nuts, candy etc. I did look at the potatoes, like a friend i've said goodbye to. Weird as I didn't feel bad, and didn't feel like, oh my god I love potatoes! Or anything like that. I thought I would.

It was weird, filling up the grocery cart with just meat & veggies... it seemed so, NATURAL, it was so weird. A good weird, not a bad one. I have a few ounces of chicken livers a week, and my husband told me that the bagger guy said, "ewwwww.... chicken livers..." and it made me laugh.

I actually bought a ton of veggies and meat, and was shocked... usually our grocery bill is $150 or more, and it was under $100 this week, and I bought a lot. I thought for sure it would be more than usual.

I made a grocery list and stuck to it. I even organized it section by section, and I was out of there in half the time. It felt strange skipping MOST of the aisles.

I'm less hungry this afternoon. This will be the end of day 3. Tomorrow i'm going to lunch with an old friend, and we always go to a place that has fresh, whole foods including salads. I'll just be having tea, iced tea or black coffee instead of my previous diet soda.

It hit me when you talked about separating my body and emotions, and working towards meshing them together into a saner package. That is a big idea for me.

Thank you for your input, this is the biggest thing i've ever gone through.

Elizabeth

Well the fact is, natural or not, we live in a culture that has more than declared, it has practically legislated that this is not a healthy, normal life approach, let alone a viable one. I wish I could count the number of people who have observed that I seem (overly?) virtuous about all this, and that doing anything like this themselves would remove most if not all of the joy from their lives. I think every addicted person here who has been maintaining at goal for a while would tell you it has nothing to do with either virtue or willpower, it has to do with reclaiming and maintaining our sanity and joy.

When I set out to eat this way, all I wanted and expected out of it was to lose weight, to not be fat anymore and to not have to FIGHT my weight and related health problems anymore. Perhaps because I never got to the morbid obesity place, I was even more tired of the fight than I was of the weight. In hindsight, I guess that really was the first big surrender point in this journey.

When I attempted to sum up what had happened to the rest of me and my life in the 3 or so years after that decision (which I made more than two years into my lowcarb journey) out came the tiny, almost incidental revelation that I chattered out in the middle of a long conversation with Connie one day, I’m guessing about 5 years ago, when I (apparently) said, you know the trick to all this is that you always have to have to lead with the diet.

A few weeks later we were chatting again and she said to me, you know, you were right when you said we have to lead with the diet. And I said “I said that? When?” I didn’t even remember saying it, but that is how it all felt, that is how it still feels. Like your cats, I eat, I finish, and I get on with the rest of my life. The sanity IS the joy of my life.

I don’t know that cats lead with the diet of course, but I do know that they somehow instinctively seem to not let it take any more than a supportive role in their lives. I suspect the biggest reason why that is, is that we haven’t yet found a way to let cat food advertising get a grip on their little cat psyches and eventually the whole cat culture.

In the past, eating WAS the beginning and end of my daily life, it punctuated and influenced everything else. My limited life was what, somewhat incidentally, happened between diets and binges. The challenge was building a new, saner life after letting go of those two extreme distractions. I don’t think I really ever knew what a sane adult life looked like, and that I think is the have-to-build-it-from-scratch place addicted eaters find themselves, once they begin leading the sanity of a clean simple diet that makes their bodies sing.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Today I weigh 172. I began at 176 on Tuesday, 5 days ago. I did see 171 flicker a little bit.

I woke up with a headache this morning, not sure why. It is slowly going away.

I am still doing well.

My main concern is pms time. That is the worst for me, total hunger and cravings. I will make sure i'm full of meat and veggies, take my vitamins, get exercise and sleep, and lead with the diet. I'm hoping my pms gets better with time eating this way.

We have two bins in the bottom of our fridge. One is full of fruit (Zach's, and really it's my fault as I bought a lot of fruit over a week ago). So once that is empty, i'll have more room for veggies. But right now, the bottom (veggie) one is chock full. That has always been hard when i've eaten veggies. I buy quite a bit at the store, and then struggle to get it all prepped and eaten.

Is it possible to buy too much... LOL... I also bought one bag of each of low carb veggies, frozen. Maybe when I go shopping next time i'll buy one of each or 1 item of each, for variety and so I don't have this problem. I just don't want stuff to go bad before I get to eat them.

I always struggled with drinking my coffee black. I've been doing it for 5 days now. Maybe I struggled before as I thought I "deserved" my 1-2 tablespoons of heavy cream in it each day. Now i'm fine with it.

I had a ton of energy yesterday, and want to do all kinds of things now. Today, I woke up with a headache, and my energy is lower. Maybe because it's Saturday morning, I have off til Tuesday, and my body is like aaaaaahhhh... we don't HAVE to go to work or anywhere else today.

We went walking yesterday, then shopping, and I probably walked for 2 hours at least. My goal is 1 hour a day. Could be why i'm tired, lol. I need to lift 2-3 times a week, not sure if I can lift as heavy/as many sets/etc as I did eating lots of carbs. I was giving myself a week or so to ease back into lifting.

Going to get ready for the day....
Elizabeth

I did this candida test, where you spit saliva into a glass of water, and look to see if "strings" and threads appear. If they do it means you have an overgrowth of candida, if it just floats on top, you don't have an overgrowth. I did have the strings/threads, and also asked my husband if he'd try too and got the same result. Not sure if this is anything really scientific or not, just wanted to do.

I have been sticking to meat and veggies now for 6 full days. As such, I decided to finally post my fitday for the last 6 days. From my readings on this forum, i'm sure my veggie carbs are quite low. Especially in the beginning.

But please let me know how it looks, I thoroughly appreciate your feedback:

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

I will also put it in my signature, sorry i'm not html savvy enough to have it just say "Elizabeth's Fitday" and have it link.

Today we went to a steak house with my parents. I did good ordering a ribye steak, and off the huge buffet I only took a portion of green beans and some carrots. I did take some lettuce/cucumber/green pepper and put a little olive oil on but it looked awful and I didn't eat that. I didn't comment on anything anyone else ate.

My parents and husband know what I can/can't eat, but my parents either don't understand or just want me to eat/get my money's worth (they treated) and kept trying to push me to eat the other stuff. It was interesting, just watching them eat things like mac n cheese, a loaded baked potato, carrot cake, ice cream, and fruit but I didn't have the urge to eat any of it. It's strange, as it doesn't look like "food" to my anymore.

It is also strange, as my dad's doctor told him he was borderline diabetic years ago, then he wasn't and now last week his doctor says he is borderline again, and he ate a baked potato, desserts, etc, and yet he mentioned this morning that they worry about us 3 kids, as they don't want us to get diabetic (like his brother/my uncle, who is in a huge mess due to his diabetes he has had for 30+ years, and has led to so many other problems that he is a burden to his wife/my aunt and is only 70).

I did have some cravings this evening, and thought, gee I could go for a peanut butter cup sundae. But I know it would make me ill, as it always had when I ate one.

I don't get why the foods that make my physically ill (wheat, gluten, dairy, desserts especially) make me terribly ill after I ate them, and why I crave them. I guess it's all about the whole being addicted to what i'm allergic to. Geez, I thought my body would smarten up, and not crave things it hates! It makes no sense to me.

But I am staying strong! And I notice a pattern, if I get cravings, they are when i'm fatigued/tired. Not in the morning or early afternoon. When I've taken a nap, they go away.

I'm still worried about pms time, when no matter how much food I eat, i'm starving, and craving crap. I just need to be strong and not give in. And maybe pms will be less as the months go by, because of all the veggies i'm eating?

I'm making sure that I have plenty of meat & veggies, ready to eat, in the fridge. Right now the fridge is bursting, LOL.

Elizabeth

I forgot to weigh myself this morning.

Wow, i'm TIRED today. I could barely get up and get to work this morning, I thought it was just the "I was away from work three days" blahs. But my energy never picked up. I spent the whole day at work being extremely tired. I don't know what is up.

Today is day 8 for me. I craved sugar, chocolate, and ice cream all day. I didn't eat any but I wanted it so bad. I know it will make me sick if I do. I think it's because i'm so tired, that I am craving sugar and junk. It's like day 19 or 20 of my 28 day menstrual cycle. Maybe its pms. I get tired, extremely hungry, and become a bottomless pit a week or so before my period.

I'm going to rest for a bit after work today and tough it out. Veggies are getting less and less appealing to me, as well as meat. I think that is a good thing, though, lol. Food is becoming fuel for me.

I just wish I would be getting to more energy.

Is there a certain amount of time needed to adapt?

Going to take a rest, Elizabeth

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 171
Goal Weight: ???

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

The following is my link in Fitday:

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

Thank you, I really appreciate your input.

Elizabeth

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 171
Goal Weight: ???

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

Another likely possibility here is that you are experiencing yeast die-off, and that will just have to pass, how long that takes is very individual. But the two suggestions I made will not hurt that process at all, in fact, in my opinion, upping the veggies should HELP that, if that's what's going on here.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Last Edited Adele on 31-May-2006 9:09 AM

I think you're right on several accounts. I have been on a beef kick as I love ribeye, and made a 3+ pound pot roast on the weekend i'm trying to use up.

Now that you mention it, chicken and fish (and especially salmon) make me "feel good" and make me full longer. Also I try to eat a few ounces of chicken livers a week, and actually bought them last time I went shopping, and forgot to eat them.

And yes, 8 days isn't much, barely over a week.

I'm feeling more energetic today, but had a bad headache come on late this afternoon.

It's been VERY challenging eating the level of veggies i'm at now, but I am working to increase. I admit I RARELY ate veggies in the last 5 years. So it's taking some getting used to. And it also shows that is part of my problem, is the lack of veggies.

I read some yeast die off symptoms, and fatigue is definitely one of them. It's just kind of hard as i'm at work at 6 am, but i'm usually home by 3:30 so I can take a nap if I need to. I've been doing that, but since eating clean I can still sleep well at my normal bedtime.

Thanks! I'll post in a day or two on my progress.

Elizabeth

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 171
Goal Weight: ???

My Fitday Log:
http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

I just wanted to check in. I have REALLY bad PMS, well not too bad tonight but all weekend, and today at work. I had the worst cramps i've had in awhile, I actually thought I was constipated. Also got a horrible headache. I took some pain medication and both subsided.

This weekend was really nasty, all I wanted was chocolate, chips, and ice cream, and well, anything not meat and veggies, lol. It drives me crazy, because I don't understand why my body wants something so bad that is horrible for me. I feel like it's trying to kill me. It's been taking every fiber of my nerves and brain to keep telling myself to stick to meat & veggies. It's very difficult. But i'm expecting my period tomorrow, so I keep telling myself, one more day. But it's one of the biggest challenges i've had, ugh.

I can't believe how much better i'm doing energy wise. I haven't been eating much beef. And each day I try to get the veggies in.

Also, even though I have the cravings really bad, I don't have the depression & deep funk I usually get when I have PMS. So that is good. Just wish I didn't want to drive around to restaurants all day and eat junk, lol.

Meat & veggies are getting very mundane to me now, which is what I knew would happen. Perhaps combined with the hormones, and lack of variety, my dragon is thinking i'm weak and is banging on the bars.

I've been using the Simple No Dragon Feed Recipes as a supplement to my cooking and also used it to build a grocery list. Wow is shopping different. I spend like forever in the produce area now, and a small amount of time in the meat, then usually just hop over to the egg and pork side section, and it's like, that was different, i'm done already?

I've noticed a few things that don't agree with me, like peppers (green, red, yellow). They give me heartburn, and generally make my tummy hurt. I do cook them. The yellow squash/zucchini/red onion stir fry with garlic hits the spot. I have been using REAL garlic bulbs (I used to get the already minced up stuff in a jar) and can't believe how much better it tastes. I never liked garlic, honestly, until now.

I haven't weighed myself for a few days, I guess I don't want to scare myself as i always put on a few pounds with time of month.

At first it was overwhelming, because it's almost impossible for me to eat out, at all. My food at home, cooked, is the best for me. I just don't really know when eating out if it's okay or not. So my grocery bill has gone up a bit (not a ton) but eating out has gone down drastically.

Also noticing, getting used to, and finally surrendering to not going out "for a treat now." We used to go out for coffee (mine with cream & sweetener) and a snack, and now if we do go, it's not fun/exciting anymore, as all I can get is a black coffee.

So i've been focusing on doing more fun things not related to foods. I bought a gps system and we started geocaching (looking for treasure, basically, using gps coordinates). It's fun, has no focus on food, gets us outside and hiking through woods we had no idea existed even though we've lived here for 4 years. I love hiking and walking through the woods. Wow. I used to do that all the time in high school and college. So it's very positive.

I need to get my sleep, it's getting late, just wanted to put down my thoughts, feelings, and updates.

Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 171
Goal Weight: ???

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

Just checking in! Once I got my period, I couldn't believe how great I felt. I had really bad pms, ugh, but I did notice my "flowage" was much better than months before, and I didn't have nearly as bad of cramps. So I hope each month it gets better.

I've been traveling lately, and haven't been able to log all of my days into fitday. But my meals are really boring. It seems little by little, that i'm focusing less and less on food being my focus.

It's still hard, as in I used to look forward to a treat... go to Barnes & Noble, and I would "just" get a decaf coffee, but i'd load it up with 1/2 and 1/2, and add splenda. Now I drink it black. I did put in a tiny sprinkle of stevia, but honestly I can give or take that.

I've been focusing on good protein, and trying to get the veggies in. I do still struggle with the veggies. It's very difficult to get them in. I am trying to at least have one nice, big fresh salad as part of my dinner.

In body changes, my fat has really "gotten ugly," as in it is so squishy. I can feel my ab muscles in my stomach underneath it. I feel like a space alien! But in certain spots, like my inner thighs, the "ugly fat" that is so jiggley is now almost gone. For only losing 8 pounds since I started, i'm really noticing changes.

And my size 10 jeans that were tight for awhile are VERY baggy now... so baggy I honestly can only wear them for an hour out of the dryer. So I had to go out and buy some size 8's!

My work clothes are so baggy. I don't want to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe since i'm still losing. So i've been checking out clearance racks when I can.

I have some skirts that should work... must dig them out..

I guess my biggest challenge has been to stick with this, day in and day out, knowing there are no "free days" "cheat days" etc. So i've just been focusing on each day, and on continuing to replace old things (going out for a treat related to food) to other things (like my hiking). I've actually been hiking on my lunch hour at local parks with a coworker.

Also I feel like "something is missing." I'm going through each day, and have the hang of eating, but I "feel like something is missing." I'm guessing that will take a long time to get over that? I kind of feel like i'm drifting along, and I keep trying to figure out what what "it" is. I'm guessing my "using food as fun/entertainment" went for so long, that I'm struggling with that.

I also struggle with "geez, the coworker brought in donuts, I haven't had a donut in months, EVERYONE else is having one, I deserve on" stuff. Or, "husband gets to eat bread and dairy without a problem, I feel like an outcast" thoughts. Ugh.

Other than that... my food has become fuel, and has become quite mundane. I'm striving to eat a variety of veggies and meats as much as possible, though I do go through phases... I think i'm back to eggs right now, and I am thinking seafood/fish is next.

Thank you for checking up on me! I'm still here, plodding along. The honeymoon is a distant memory... which feels good, but it's sure brought on more challenges!

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 168
Goal Weight: ???

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

I believe this is a significant part of the process Elizabeth, for “both” kinds of lowcarbers, but especially for emotionally addicted ones. Food-entertainment (distraction) occupied a good bit our life before, NOT using it does leave at least one hole in our lives. If we had/have emotional entanglements with foods, after a while, because we have essentially “taken and left the top off” of our emotional tank (it’s usually a cesspool), abstinence will lead to what I call spillage. I had no clue I had emotional food issues until they started bubbling up and out about 9 months after I got to goal (which was about 1 year of abstinence), I really thought my situation was all physiological until that time.

I also struggle with "geez, the coworker brought in donuts, I haven't had a donut in months, EVERYONE else is having one, I deserve on" stuff. Or, "husband gets to eat bread and dairy without a problem, I feel like an outcast" thoughts. Ugh.

Resentment, huh? That’s a big and predictable (to me anyway, now) stage in this journey. You just live with it and keep eating calm, steady and straight and like every other emotion we experience, it eventually dissipates. I still feel it once in a while, I’d venture to say we all do. But the big picture is this diet, these choices I make every single day, have been very very good to me, I sure can’t muster up and maintain much resentment over THAT.

Stay in touch Elizabeth, keep us informed of how it’s going, okay? And keep eating those veggies. Those are the magic of this, they really really are.

Adele (140 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Other than that, not too much has changed. I am eating more veggie soups, as they seem to agree with my gut better than sauteed/roasted veggies. Also easier to digest when i'm stressed out.

I've been seeing a career counselor in the last two months, and we've touched on other areas in my life, too. Kind of a long story, but I work in an environment that is very noisy and makes concentration extremely difficult, especially since I have a highly technical job. I sit near the machining area, and it's like listening to high powered, noisy dentist drills all day long. Plus others listen to radios at levels where others can hear then. I basically go to work, put up with it, and put in ear plugs when I can't handle it anymore.

My counselor is helping me to trust my instincts again, and one was when I started my current company, I thought I could adjust to the environment, but in reality i'm more miserable than ever. I had been unemployed for 3 months and was just happy to have a job. I'm currently working on finding a company to work for that is more in line with my needs and goals.

I eat out less than ever now, as very few restaurants have something I can eat, and even those, it's so hard to know exactly for sure what is in the food. So i've been eating practically all my meals at home. Which is fine, I personally think my cooking is better than any restaurant anyway. ;)

Unbelievably, to me, is that i'm very slowly getting over the "it's not fair" thing, when people bring in brownines, cookies, cake, donuts, etc. I just see the stuff, and it is getting to the point it doesn't look like food. Of course I have trying times, especially when I can SMELL bread/baked goods. But it is weird, i'm getting to the point of stuff I can't eat almost looks like it's fake food, like stuff made out of plastic for a display.

I still of course struggle with people like my mom and some others, in that they still dont grasp out I eat. That is getting so old. Very tiring. Yet they don't tire of haggling with me to eat dessert/etc. Ugh. WEll, that probably will never go away.

My last menstral cycle was only 20 days long. I'm not sure exactly why, i've heard when you lose fat that the hormones from birth control pills, etc, gets circulated and it can mess with your cycle. Usually mine is 28 days long.

But, i'm very happy to report, no PMS!!! ????? I didn't feel the depressed, bad, feelings, and I didn't have any horrible cravings. I'm not sure if this is my body finally cleaning house, or if it is just a one time occurance. To not have terrible cravings, and be crying a week before my period, would indeed be a miracle.
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 162
Goal Weight: ???

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

It will dissipiate but it’s going to take major, MAJOR time, I'm talking years. It's part of what you have to build. If you haven’t already, I hope you’ll read: How Do I Get Other People To Understand?

Glad you checked in Elizabeth, sounds like you’re muddling through. Keep leading with what’s the best for your body, and it will slowly come together for you and hopefully stay that way this time.

Check back in here in a few weeks (or sooner if something comes up!)

Adele (140 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Time for a check in. I was doing fairly well, but last week ate some dairy. I was really struggling with how my coffee tastes without cream, and was adding a tablespoon of heavy cream a day to my morning coffee. I also started using butter last week, no more than 1 tablespoon a day too. My weight crept up (from 160 to 163, it's back down to 161 now) and now I have a nasty sinus infection to deal with (something that would happen if I ate a lot of cheese when I used to do Atkins).

I guess I like cream/coffee/sweetener, and still have struggles drinking it black. Is there a brand/type that tastes good black? :) So now i'm drinking black tea for some caffeine, and a little decaf green tea now and then. Other than that it's hot water (it's the only way that water tastes somewhat palatable to me).

I guess I was thinking that since those two things are so high fat, I would be fine, but now i'm miserable, and have the sinus infection (which I feel has moved into my chest).

I've also been analyzing to see if beef is a problem for me. Whether it's steak or a ground hamburger patty, I end up feeling hungry, starved, and have cravings that eventually go away, after eating a 400 calorie serving. If I wait it out and do not eat anything more than the beef and veggies, eventually the hunger/starved/craving feelings go away.

I think Adele has this issue with beef? Perhaps it's all connected with dairy. Cows are evil for me?

Also, now that I am 161 do I need to readjust my calories? I've been eating @ 1700 a day.

I'm still dealing with those closest to me pushing food. Even my husband surprises me now and then by wanting to go out for a "treat".

I find it nearly impossible to eat out at all, though I suppose that is a good thing. No matter how I ask things to be prepared, and try to be careful, I always feel hungrier and have cravings after a dinner or lunch out. My weight always goes up for awhile too.

I'm doing better with the veggies though!!! I keep making the same basic meals over and over. They taste good but they are fuel now and satisfy me and don't produce cravings. Stir fries seem to be my best friend. I do much better digestion wise eating veggies cooked that way, versus raw as in a salad.

My clothes have gotten so baggy, with the small amount of weight loss, that I had to break down and hit some sales. I tried on several pairs of pants in my closet that I couldn't even get on until now, and they fit! One pair was even baggy.

I think it's going to take some time to get over this sinus infection. Any suggestions? Other than eating clean again with no dairy. I'm also laying off the beef for now.

Thank you,
Elizabeth

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 161
Goal Weight: 150?

Thanks!

Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 161
Goal Weight: 150?

Elizabeth, dairy products are notorious for causing sinus and respiratory difficulties. Once you get clean, a little bit often does exactly what it seems to have done to you. With all the other problem foods removed, you can really feel the effects. It is likely that going back to the dairy is what caused your sinuses to flare.

I guess I like cream/coffee/sweetener, and still have struggles drinking it black. Is there a brand/type that tastes good black?

Not that I am aware of, although I really don’t like the popular stronger, bitter types at all, with or without lightening or sweetening. If I had to choose a national brand, I guess I’d choose Folgers. BUT, what I use is Kroger brand (their own label slapped on Spotlight coffee, I suspect) which I grind myself before brewing. I think for cleaner diet/anti-yeast purposes, fresh ground is probably a better idea, and this happens to taste better and cost less than Folgers anyway.

I guess I was thinking that since those two things are so high fat, I would be fine, but now i'm miserable, and have the sinus infection (which I feel has moved into my chest).

In my opinion and experience butter and cream do not exactly = fat (even though I know technically they are), for our purposes they = dairy. This is similar to the analogy that both sugar and broccoli are carbs. Most bodies, but especially highly reactive/sensitive ones (which is what I think most of us here have, to one degree or another) respond much differently to different KINDS of fat, just like we react differently to different kinds of CARBS.

I've also been analyzing to see if beef is a problem for me. Whether it's steak or a ground hamburger patty, I end up feeling hungry, starved, and have cravings that eventually go away, after eating a 400 calorie serving. If I wait it out and do not eat anything more than the beef and veggies, eventually the hunger/starved/craving feelings go away.

I think Adele has this issue with beef? Perhaps it's all connected with dairy.

I eat very little beef, finding out that my body was sensitive to beef was the key that unlocked a 21 month stall at 165 pounds for me. I don’t use any milk products, but I do fine on pork, turkey, chicken (and eggs). However, I know plenty of lowcarbers who do great on beef and chicken but not so great with dairy and/or eggs. I think that as we get into the final layers and learn the finer points and preferences of our bodies, it gets extremely individual.

Cows are evil for me?

I don’t know that I’d make this into a moral issue, lol.

Also, now that I am 161 do I need to readjust my calories? I've been eating @ 1700 a day.

Go to this site and see where your basal is. BMR Calculator Generally you want to be eating about 200-250 calories over whatever number you get at this site. Folks need to look at very slightly adjusting calories down ever so slightly for every ~10 pounds lost. It’s not much, but 50 too-many calories a day, over time can make a difference, especially as we get into healthy bodyweight territory. I STILL want/tend to eat slightly too many calories, I STILL tend to have my weight drift up if I am not careful.

I'm still dealing with those closest to me pushing food. Even my husband surprises me now and then by wanting to go out for a "treat".

See my long post about Mary this morning. Elizabeth, this all takes a very long time, AFTER you get to goal. In the past you’ve been “on diets”, and those close to you have pretty much humored you about that. Well, assuming you stay the course, they will need to move beyond the humoring and they will eventually. You can’t force that, you can’t really affect it much at all, except to hold steady with your needs until they see that these really are long-term permanent changes you’re making, that they are very important to you, AND that the minor inconveniences your needs require from them are worth keeping a relationship with you. I hope that makes some sense.

There should be no reason why you can’t go out for a “treat” with your husband. You can have a cup of coffee or some bottled water. No, it’s not the same, and maybe eventually going out for a food treat will not be as fun for him and then the two of you might slowly find something to do together such as going for a walk together in the evenings. That’s what my husband and I do often now, it’s kinda nice! I think this is one of those “if you build it they will come” things.

My sister and I had an interesting talk about this just last weekend. She told me that she found she had to mourn part of our relationship and come to her own terms with it. She and I used to share recipes a lot, we were both “foodies” (she’s a registered dietician, a food “professional”!) and as part of this journey, I had to withdraw from that (tiny little, but very important to her) part of our relationship. Some of the same elements are true for our spouses and other close friends. For instance, if going out eating pizza and drinking beer was an important and bonding ritual in your past (and I think we all have our family food rituals), it takes some time to find and make new rituals.

You can’t fix all this in a few weeks or months. It’s a slow journey.

I find it nearly impossible to eat out at all, though I suppose that is a good thing. No matter how I ask things to be prepared, and try to be careful, I always feel hungrier and have cravings after a dinner or lunch out. My weight always goes up for awhile too.

This is pretty much the case for me as well, although I have found that I can manage surprisingly well if I have to even on a vacation where we eat out for a week. It’s challenging, not ideal, and it is expensive, but it can be done. I do think that at your place in this journey it IS hard, and therefore it would be helpful if you and your DH can work together to minimize this for at least the short term. That, of course, will vary on your lifestyle.

Here’s what I found about that issue in my journey: In the past, the major reason we ever ate out was because I didn’t plan very well. When I had a plan, and learned to be a day ahead of myself on meals (including getting things for tomorrow’s meals out of the freezer today), the “need” to eat out was minimal. So it turned out that the BIGGEST obstacle to keeping restaurant eating to a minimum was very much within my control.

That leaves a few social occasions, eating in restaurants with friends, and here’s one suggestion for dealing with those at this point in your journey—when a restaurant meal can throw you back two weeks you’d rather not spend doing “repair” work on. As frustrating, expensive maddening as this may seem, unless you are positive you will be eating at a place where you can get your needs accommodated, then EAT BEFORE YOU GO, order a minimum amount at the restaurant and just enjoy the people as best you can.

Also, before accepting an invitation to eat out with others, especially if it’s a dutch treat kind of gathering, you can always use the VALID reason that “Frank and I are watching our pennies and have decided to cut back on restaurant spending. Why don’t we get together for a potluck and then a game of euchre at our house instead?” I have really come to appreciate the joys of gathering with friends at home, as opposed to in noisy, crowded, expensive restaurants where everybody spends and eats too much.
I'm doing better with the veggies though!!! I keep making the same basic meals over and over. They taste good but they are fuel now and satisfy me and don't produce cravings. Stir fries seem to be my best friend. I do much better digestion wise eating veggies cooked that way, versus raw as in a salad.
Cooked vegetables can be helpful, it’s one way to get in more vegetables carbs and fiber, because cooking tenderizes and shrinks vegetables, so you can get more fiber in less food volume. Cooking has no effect on fiber in foods.

I think it's going to take some time to get over this sinus infection. Any suggestions? Other than eating clean again with no dairy. I'm also laying off the beef for now.

I don’t know about beef, but I’d suggest staying off the dairy and paying close attention to what happens the next time you decide to “test” that.

Glad you checked in here. Keep on keeping us informed Elizabeth!

Adele (140 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 160

Well I think I might be pregnant, how is that for an update? I had two early (6-8 week) miscarriages last year and wanted to wait a couple more months to try again, and i've been tracking all my fertility signs, and well I guess my body might be smarter than me. My period is 9 days late now, I don't feel pregnant, have burned through a pregnancy test a day for the last week, all negative. I'll go into the doctor next week and have a blood test done just to verify or not. If i'm not pregnant, I wonder if the cleansing of my body is causing cycle differences. Though they have been 27 days forever, but last month was 20 days.

I've been testing beef, it is definitely a problem, so i'm sticking with fish, chicken, eggs, pork, and occasional lamb. Veggie eating going great. I'm hungry a lot though and it's hard keeping my calories down.

Since i've been around 160# I was trying to keep my calories @ 250 above my basal. But, honestly, i've been working out a lot lately (from hardly at all to weight lifting 3x/week and 30-40 minutes of either walking or my elliptical machine on other days).

So I am tweaking my calories. Maybe i'm not eating enough? I've been eating about 1800/day. Carbs (from veggies) are about 70-90/day.

Finally noticing nice muscles/leanness even though the pounds are screaming off, probably due to the increased exercise. It feels great to have energy to workout again!

I think there is additional stuff I need to post, but it's getting late and I need to get to bed. Will post as I remember, that is probably easier.

Thank you, Elizabeth

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 159
Goal Weight: ???

Eating lots of veggies, and avoiding eating beef. I'm settling more into eating turkey, chicken, eggs, salmon, and shrimp.

I think i'm getting into a more permanent groove, more and more. I still struggle, ugh, but food is becoming less and less of a spotlight in my life. Which is good.

I'm working out again as of last night (stopped for @ 5 days because I was so miserable) and am back to lifting, walking, and doing my elliptical. I'm doing about an hour 3 times a week of lifting and elliptical, and walking for @ an hour on other days.

Thank you Adele, and others, for helping me in my journey.

Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 160

I think i'm getting into a more permanent groove, more and more. I still struggle, ugh, but food is becoming less and less of a spotlight in my life. Which is good.

I still struggle sometimes Elizabeth, the culture isn’t going to change, this is never going to be easy, just easier to deal with than the results of the lousy choices I used to make for myself.

Gotta say I’m relieved that you’re not pregnant right now. It would probably would be ideal if you could get to and maintain at goal for at least a year before going ahead with that—I wish I could report otherwise, but I haven’t yet seen a lowcarber end up with anything but a 40 or more pound regain after a pregnancy. This doesn’t mean it can’t be done, and I’d be thrilled to see someone actually manage to hold the food line during gestation, but pregnancy seems to give all-or-nothing addicts irresistible reasons to throw what’s good for their body out the window—ostensibly “for the baby,” but every single time, in the people who came and went from lowcarb lists I read, the “healthy pregnancy diet” morphed within weeks from whole grains and fruit to total crap.

Keep us posted honey.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

No Adele, i'm still around. I'm down to 158 now. I'm still eating the same way, but have had a couple of binges in the last two months, both right before my period. I was treated with lovely bronchitis and got my period at the same time this month, lol.

Grocery shopping is such a breeze, that when I was sick my husband didn't even need a list. I thought it was funny, usually I lose my appetite when sick, but I still had mine following my way of eating.

So i'm on the mend right now.

Also, my highest jean size (I only buy the same brand/cut/type of jeans) was a size 14. I very slowly moved into 12's, then 10's. The 10's started getting baggy, and I finally tried on my only pair of 8's that I bought probably 2 years ago, and laughed that i'd ever be able to fit into. No way, not only did I get them on, but I zipped & buttoned them, and they were BAGGY!!!!! :) So now I need to go buy 6's, as a reward. Also went to a department store last night, they do not carry my brand of jeans, but I tried on a black sweater and a medium fit! I used to only buy xl or at least a large. It was so strange. I was an xs all over and size 3 jeans in high school.

I have been exercising more frequently (well exept when I got sick a week ago). I do 1/2 hour of weightlifting then 1/2 hour of elliptical machine. My goal was every other day and I got into a groove and then it was easy (after about 3 weeks).

A close friend has remarked on my weight loss, saying I look great. My husband says I look leaner. Also a coworker who never notices anything stopped me and asked if it was okay to tell me that you can definitely see the change.

but you know what... I still have this gut fat on my belly. I'm losing so much in my butt (I don't think I have one anymore) and legs, and my arms but the damned belly. And I haven't even had kids yet, lol. I'm hoping that continuing to eat this way and working out will change it, but I was really hoping that that gut stuff, especially the junk right under my boobs (which are large, but my fat still sticks out almost as much). Yuck. I haven't bought too many clothes other than as a necessity as they are too baggy especially work clothes, but I am still not to the point where I can go into a store and put on most things and not look hideous (to me).

So... i'm still plodding along. Losing inches, some pounds, and hoping to lose my belly, and going to get on track hopefully this week i'll feel better to start working out again.

I noticed a huge change in my moods with doing the every other day workouts. Endorphins I guess. I've been pretty much in a foul mood since I got sick, almost depressed. My great friend at work lost his job last week on top of it, so i've had a bad week.

Keeping on keeping on... i'll try to check in more consistently. Geez, i've lost 18 pounds! Need to really give myself credit!!! :)

Elizabeth

p.s.: edited to add that I have FINALLY started weighing myself every day. This has been a HUGE struggle for me.

----------
Initial Weight: 176 (jean size 14)
Current Weight: 158 (jean size 6/8)
Goal Weight: ??? Goal Jean Size?

Last Edited bluefizzure on 22-Oct-2006 11:00 AM

Sorry I haven't written in a long time. Been busy with work, and life. I'll post a quick update... i'm down to 145 right now. Size Small top, though they are pretty baggy. My pant size is between a 4 & 6 depending on cut/style/maker. I'm eating a more paleo style diet, mostly leaner meats (turkey/chicken/lean beef, @ 3 eggs a day) plus fruits (2-3 pieces a day) and veggies. I avoid nuts as much as possible, but do have them on occasion.

I've settled well into this way of eating, and feel great.

My tummy fat is slowly coming off. The rest of me has leaned out pretty well, except my belly, but it's slowly getting there. I know I should start exercising again and have been doing hiking as much as I can since the weather has been unseasonably warmer.

I still struggle with restaurant eating (they always seem to have hidden junk in them like wheat/dairy even though I stress I can't eat it). Friends and family are much more accommodating in regards to eating at their houses. When I have people over, it's all gluten/dairy free.

So... that's about it. I do still have my weak times, especially @ PMS time. I did go back on the pill and since doing so my general moods and well-being are much better. I still crave wheat/dairy during Time of Month. I wonder if that will ever change? Also on occasion when people at work cook microwave popcorn and other aromatic foods, it does smell so good but I don't eat it. I've noticed my whole life that most foods smell better than they taste.

My husband now can keep foodstuffs I can't eat (bread, wheat, crackers, cookies, etc) in the house without it bothering me, so that is an improvement.

Thanks again for all of your help and support. I feel like i've come a long way since I started posting.

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 145
Goal Weight: ???

Wow it's been awhile since I put in an update! I'm still @ 148. I haven't been exercising, and once I get going on that I am sure i'll be down some more pounds, or at least get the extra fat bit on my tummy gone.

Things are pretty smooth, except I seem to have gotten sick quite a bit this year already. I've been doing some research on immune system, and I thought eliminating grains/wheat/gluten/dairy would help. I did have a doctor tell me once not to drink caffeine, as it lowered resistance, but I am down to one cup of black coffee a day.

yes... black, Adele, and I actually prefer/love it that way! Hah... never believed it was possible!!! :)

My size 4 pants are all baggy. I've gone through so many clothes (high 14 when I was 6-8 weeks pregnant then miscarried). And i've bought pants/clothes all along, so i've spent a ton o money this past year. Also went from an XL to a size small top. Now those are getting baggy. I hate wearing baggy clothes, esp @ work, but I want to start exercising (lifting/cardio) and once I get down to where I want then i'll probably spluge at some sales.

Oh here's a link to my blog with some pics of my husband and I trip to Door County a few weeks ago:

http://bluefizzure.blogspot.com/2007/04/door-county-pics.html

In regards to immune system, do any of you get sick? How often? Mine always involves my sinuses. :( This past week has been esp difficult, headaches, tons of junk coming out my nose, not sleeping well. I just started working out the week before, too. Some people are NEVER sick, or very rarely, and I feel like I take 150% better care of myself than they do, and I feel like I catch whatever comes my way.

Other than that, not too much new... wanted to update, and also print out the recipe section... there was a great meatloaf recipe with peppers that was awesome!

Oh and i'm eating mostly lean meats (boiled eggs without the yolks, occasional lean beef, sashimi, chicken breast, turkey breast), veggies (all kinds) some fruit (2-3 pieces a day), and use small amounts of olive oil for cooking, and an occasional handful of almonds. That's it. Oh and my 1 cup of black coffee a day! It took a LONG time for my body to digest the veggies properly, it must have been an enzyme issue? I had a problem with diahhrea/them going right through me, and making me VERY hungry, but now I digest them just fine... thank goodness!!!!

So... can anyone help me out with giving me an immune system that is really stong??? :)

Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 148
Goal Weight: ???

Last Edited on 14-May-2007 3:00 PM

I have to say that given what I have learned about you, especially the fact that 6 months ago you were lamenting “tummy fat”, that 2-3 pieces of fruit a day is a little worrisome. I have seen slowly escalating fruit consumption eventually undo too many lowcarbers. It’s often what leads the slow path down the abyss, which is the “other” way down. Sure your body could be different, but I wonder, how do you feel if you don’t eat any fruit in a day?

I’m also just a little concerned about your concentration on LEAN foods? What kind of daily fat percentage are you averaging? Have you put a menu on Fitday recently? What does your pie chart look like?

The antioxidant vitamins are the ones most credited with strengthening an immune system. Those are Vitamins C and E along with beta carotene. I’ve also often seen the minerals zinc and selenium mentioned as important antioxidants. I take supplements that contain all of these and have for many years.

Honestly, if you’re getting sick a lot, adding some quality antioxidant supplements couldn’t hurt. However, I would cut back on the fruit, fruit feeds yeast, yeast makes “tummy fat” AND weakens immune systems.

I guess I’m wondering, are you really okay, or are you drifting away from what would be better for your body?

Adele (143 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Last Edited on 15-May-2007 3:27 PM

I wrote a long message last night but sometimes when I try to post using my old laptop with windows 98, when I click send, it locks up...so here goes again...

I guess basically, I was moving towards more standard paleo, as i'm on quite a few paleo lists, and I guess it just seems "natural". But that is a problem with me. I start reading groups, etc, and bodybuilding sites and thinking it's okay to eat things like fruit, etc. And why, not, it's "healthy", right?

but most people I know don't seem affected by dairy, wheat, or gluten like I do. Does that mean I should eat those foods, too, even though they make me sick, congested, foggy, irritable, and give me no energy?

Honestly, i've never even liked fruit. And my blood pressure is back up again. I cut the caffeine but that made no difference.

You're right. I need to get back on track. But my biggest struggle is to stop reading those darn paleo, nutrition, bodybuilding sites. Lord knows I have enough interests I want to pursue, and what i've been doing has not been working. I've gotten pretty bad sicknesses three times this year already, and i'm STILL sick with a sinus infection. And not from eating gluten/dairy but from eating fruit and nuts.

I guess i've been struggling, and need to stay the heck away from nutrition sites/forums/groups (well except this one of course). Because what seems to be working for 95% of the population isn't working for me.

I did stock up my fridge with meat and veggies this past weekend. I can't eat more than 2 whole eggs at a time, otherwise I get nauseous. But I can eat two whole eggs, plus some meat. Not sure what is causing the nausausness. Maybe it's getting adjusted again?

I've never liked dark meat poultry, or really fatty meats like ribeye steak. I prefer and feel much better eating things like sirloin steak and tenderloin, and chicken breast. I seem to do okay with pork, except for fresh side, which is almost impossible to find anyway.

My pie charts (I use dietpower on my computer, as I tried fitday and it didn't work for me) were roughly isocaloric when I was eating fruit. I am dusting off my dietpower and will start tracking again. Truth is I HATE HATE HATE tracking/logging/weighing my food. I really do. And i'm not looking forward to doing it again. But if it's what I need to do i'll do it... kicking and screaming... lol. I can post my ratios/food after I get about a weeks worth in.

I bought a vitamin supplement at Vitamin Shoppe yesterday, it's called My Favorite Multi. I had to return their woman's formula as it had soy in it and I reacted horribly to it.

I really think you're right about the fruit as i've noticed in the past that when I add it in i get headaches. Again, i've never liked fruit my whole life, and a lot was sitting in our fridge for weeks as I just didn't feel like eating it.

Adele, thank you so much for your help and kick in the butt. I guess I struggle a lot with "well it's healthy, it's natural" but am not listening to how my body wants to be treated...

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 147

I think our dragons push and prod us to research our way—ANY way—around abstinence.

You didn’t address my question about your Fitday pie chart? It sounds like you’re not getting enough fat, and that’s so important. You may need to figure out a good fat that your body likes. Maybe pure coconut oil, olive oil, grapeseed? I dunno. My body prefers meat fats, especially chicken and pork fats, and it can handle olive oil, but it clearly prefers meat fats.

How about a week or so on Fitday as part of your refocusing??

Because what seems to be working for 95% of the population isn't working for me.

What universe are you living in? Because I sure don’t see much working so well for most of the folks in the universe I’m living in?? Maybe the universe of online paleo eaters, but I think those can be as deceiving as the universe of online lowcarbers, where it can SEEM like most people are doing well, but the reality is that few are—over the longer haul anyway.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

This is my third day of eating veggies, fat, protein. What is weird is my belly fat is itching like mad, which is the area that has the most fat on my body. Not sure if that means anything, but

I used dietpower (a software program) before as it was easier for me to use than fitday, and all of my foods are stored in there. I tried using it last night, but it must have something wrong with it, as it didn't work.

So... i'll be using Fitday. Started logging foods yesterday. I've cut out the fruit & nuts, and am working to increase my veggies & fat. So far it's been low on veggies and fat, and high on protein. And i've run out of veggies already, so I need to plan to go shopping 2x/week instead of 1x/week.

Researching is definitely my downfall. I've done it forever. I wrote a list last night of things I want/need to do instead of researching. I caught myself doing it, and it was very tough. I've come addicted to it, but I can't believe how many hours a week I spend doing it. Time I need to spend buying food I need, preparing, weighing/measuring, logging, and the rest of my tasks. I hate to admit it, but I do "listen to every whisper in the wind" and I admit i'm addicted to it.

I thought about your question about fats my body likes. I was struggling with the meat, and remembered I love chicken skin on chicken. I still prefer the breast, but I love the skin. Also I love chicken wings.

Btw, I did print out and read through my posts in the last year. Wow. What an eye opener. And helpful, as it will help me.

I added a link to my fitday, let me know what you think after a week. Already i'm low on fat & veggies, but i'm working on that.

Also aiming for walking an hour a day. Lifting 3x/week. Working up to both.

I'll check in later this week.

Elizabeth

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 148

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

I did track in fitday for awhile late in May I believe of my food in fitday. I found my dietpower software program that I was using and started using that again instead.

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

My calories were around 1600-1700, @ 60% fat, 30% protein, and 10% carbs (carbs @ 60-80 grams a day with about 20-30 grams of fiber).

I am sticking to meat, veggies, olive oil, salt & pepper, and some dried spices.

It is such a struggle for me, and also I have been having a lot of digestion issues. Somedays or meals I digest things just fine, and other days I get crampy and have diahhrea. I get diahhrea quite a lot, but not always from the same foods. And that makes it even harder.

I was going okay in the beginning, but kept eating the same foods over and over, and for me I need to eat more of a variety, so I expanded my meat & veggies so I wasn't eating the same thing day in and day out.

Since I cut out the fruit and nuts over a month ago, my belly has gotten mushier and feels like it's breaking up the fat. I've also felt really tired and listless the last month, and feel like i'm killing off the yeast. I'm hoping I feel better overall soon. I do have days when I have more energy, but i've been taking a lot of naps, usually one every day, and on the weekends. It's like i'm tired but can't sleep, and have been suffering from insomnia quite a bit.

I tried eating fattier meats, and I can tolerage whole eggs but I am avoiding beef & pork as they make me feel bloated and nauseous. I've been eating mostly chicken, turkey, eggs, and fish. The fish being mostly salmon or tuna. I tried eating dark meat poultry and it makes me feel nausous. I don't know why.

So... i'm so not interested in my food anymore, and have to pretty much shovel it in, and i'm feeling very tired, with bouts of indegestion and diahhrea. But i'm hoping it is yeast die-off symptoms.

That's about it... hanging in there... but struggling...

Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 145

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

But the bad news is that overall you seem neither healthier nor happier than a year ago when you first began cleaning up your diet, and I’m honestly not sure why. I think there could be several reasons, some within your control, others not.

I note from your Fitday recordings that you do indeed struggle to include enough fat daily, which is what I suspected when you mentioned your concentration on lean meats (and eggs whites—why no yolks, that’s where the fat is??) plus your constant struggle to eat enough veggies. Perhaps this is necessary because of your problems with beef and dark-meat chicken. Could you find and include fattier pork? Have you found any bottled oils (coconut, grapeseed, nut oils?) you can tolerate? Are you eating lots of cooked vegetables (which you can season with meat fat-drippings)? That’s a way to eat more vegetables, and get more fiber, with less volume of food.

You also mentioned eating sashimi and (1) I wonder if that’s true sashimi (raw fish) or the newer so-called sashimi which is raw fish made with the accoutrements of sushi including sweet fermented rice soy sauce, etc., and (2) I wonder if eating if eating raw fish is a wise choice for someone as immuno-compromised as you seem to be?

So I guess overall I’m wondering how consistently you are following the diet that you are learning is best for your body. It seems to me as though you might get to a certain point where you are slightly better physically, then you begin attempting to move away from the food choices that got you there (chronic researching being part of that pattern) and that those decisions bring problems back in.

It doesn’t seem as if you’ve ever gotten to the “even though oftentimes I’d rather not have to eat this way, I feel so much better, I feel really good most days” place. Honestly, if I were you, I’m not sure I could hold to such a stringent diet without such an undeniably positive payback.

What I cannot grasp with the information you provide is whether that’s because you’re not following the diet consistently enough for your body, or whether there’s more to your health picture than diet alone will address. If you have a highly reactive body (and as I’ve said here before, I think most of us who get to this point have fairly complicated and hyper-reactionary bodies) about the worst thing we can do is vacillate between healthy, abstinent eating and including problem foods (like fruits, sweet fermented rice, dairy, or all-out off-plan foods). Bodies in the process of trying to heal seem to go especially ballistic when we do that.

If that’s NOT the case, and again, I just can’t get a handle here on whether it is or not (we can talk about that here or privately if you’d like), then I think it might help you to start researching (yup!) to find a competent medical professional who is knowledgeable about candida, leaky gut syndrome, intestinal parasites and related issues.

Adele (142 this morning)

----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Thank you for your input, and for rereading my journal from start to now. I did this back in May.

I think I really need to get back to basics with my food. I was adding in too many extras, like seasonings (including seasonings that contain a blend, where it is hard to tell what is all in it), stevia in my coffee, and the occasional diet soda. I noticed when I went ultra clean the first week towards the end of May (when you said to track in Fitday) my belly itched, and I could actually feel the fat dissipating. Then I slowly started adding things like the spices/blends, and I seemed to get bloated again.

I think that I need to really give it a fair chance, of eating meat, fats, veggies, and just salt & pepper. I loved bacon, but was never able to find the fresh side, and i've looked at a ton of grocery stores, from local chains to smaller upscale places. I need to eat more soups/cooked veggies.

I made a medium-sized salad for dinner tonight, and it had chicken I made myself with just oil, black pepper, and salt, over romaine lettuce, 1 cherry tomato, a few carrot shavings, a small amount of purple cabbage, and some olive oil. I had diahhrea several times. Sometimes when I eat a salad, I have no problems. I don't really get it, but I will just do cooked veggies and cooked veggies in soup (I make my own broth from scratch) for now.

I seem to be doing well with eggs, which is great. I can eat 3 scrambled in some olive oil & salt & pepper and do just fine, and not feel nauseous. Ive not tried too much pork, i'm thinking you mean something fattier than pork tenderloin, but obviously not ham due to curing. I've never made a pork roast, I will try that and see how it works.

I have been taking 1 tablespoon of Carlson's Cod Liver Oil a day so I am getting more fat in.

I do have coconut oil and olive oil. I will check into other types of oils. I don't have a problem with oils as far as I can tell.

I will also cook my veggies with meat drippings. That sounds good, and hopefully my body will tolerate it.

I will avoid sashimi for now. I eat it with just the raw fish and a small amount of the wasabi.

YOu're very much right about me never having gotten to the "even though often times i'd rather not have to eat this way, I feel so much better, I feel really good most days" place. But I do feel better than when I ate wheat and dairy, and felt overwhelming tiredness that I had to nap after eating things like rice or other carbs.

I believe my body is extremely hyper reactive, and as such I really need to watch things. That is why it is so hard for me to eat out. I need to cut out the incidentals and focus on the meats/oils/salt/pepper and be patient with my body and become very aware of my reactions.

Adele, I really appreciate all of your time and help and advice. I'm struggling but I am still headed in the right direction. I need to be more stringent with the fuel i'm putting in my body. I will report back on any improvements (which I really am hoping i'll see) by being much more stringent.

Thank you, Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 145

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

Not much else to report, except I still like to "look" at crappy foods. I haven't had overwhelming cravings, but feel like the oddman out whenever I eat with anyone besides myself. People really aren't very interested in what i'm eating, though, so it's partly me being subconscious.

So that is my update... nothing exciting, which is fine with me. I've been struggling to constantly have meat/veggies made this week as i'm in meetings this week that go from 8-5 and I get there early, around 6, to get caught up. But i'm doing it!

So...i'm keeping on, keeping on. I'm just so happy my body seems to be much happier.

Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 144

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

I have my battles, but for the most part i'm feeling and doing much better. My weight is slowly going down at this point. I really need to get back into exercise. I had strep throat two weeks ago and I was going good until then.

I still have some bit of fat left, especially on my belly, but it's slowly going away so i'm not too worried about it.

My only big main problem is PMS still. I thought by now it would be better. Just feel depressed, extremely tired, and want to eat wheat & dairy, especially together. I've done well fighting it, telling myself i'll take a nap when I get home from work instead of caving in. But it is very tough.

I'm a ton hungrier during PMS too. So i've just been stuffing in the veggies and my meats & fats so I don't binge.

I also run out of room in the fridge for all my veggies so i'm shopping 2x/week at least now. I try to get one of each veggie (like cabbage) unless they are small (like zucchini) then I buy more. So i'm aiming for more variety.

Adele, question on nightshades (well peppers especially bell peppers). What issues do you have with them?

I'll try to check in more often!
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 142

They make my joints hurt. All nightshades, the family that includes the lowcarb veggies tomatoes, peppers and eggplant seem to cause that in me. (Tomatoes, especially fresh ones, are my worst offender, eggplant also gives me the trots. I do very occasionally eat a little bit of peppers--had a red one in a stir-fry just last night.)

Potatoes are also a nightshade family plant, but of course they are not lowcarb. Yams are not terribly lowcarb, not paleo, but they are not nightshades.

You can Google, and read up on, "food families" if you're interested.

P.S.: I'm glad you returned Elizabeth, I hate to lose longer-termers! (grin) Don't give up on yourself, huh?

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 11+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Last Edited on 29-Sep-2007 7:23 AM

Felt like total crap, couldn't breathe, my joints all ached, I was stuffy, couldn't stop coughing, and felt ill for about a week later. I was doing very well, and just everything hit.

Just a reminder that no matter how hard life gets, I need to not give into temptation, no matter how awful my cravings and how awful my life is going. Things would have went a TON better if I had lead with the diet and not my cravings, mood, and stress. I felt like crap for a week just because of that one day. Not worth it.

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 148
Goal Weight: 140

http://www.fitday.com/WebFit/PublicJournals.html?Owner=elizB

I did choose ONE sugar-and-grain eating day (the day after Christmas, 1998) about a month after my click moment, my “last” decision to stay with this, the one I just mentioned in my post to Laina. I got very sick (with joint pains, I couldn’t stand up or walk for several days). It took me about 6-8 weeks to fully recover. It was a gift. It is what cemented my decision to NEVER (and that time, it seems I really did mean never) eat off plan again.

This is an especially tough time of year to have a set-back like this, to have let sugar back in, to be that kind of weakened. I hope you’ll lead yourself away from this with an especially firm plan through the next 6-8 weeks and that by doing this, you’ll bring yourself out on the other side of the holidays with relief that you chose yourself stronger, day by day (sometimes minute by minute) through what is the most challenging time of the year for most of us.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 11+ years
Maintaining at goal 8+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Last Edited on 19-Nov-2007 6:34 PM

I just wanted to post an update, since it's been since November since I posted last.

Adele, it was a struggle to get back on track. REALLY bad. As in I was really shocked how long it took.

I've been very busy as of late with job searching, taking up a new hobby and brushing up on my career skills/resume/cover letters/etc, including what I want to do when I grow up. ;)

I find that the more boring, simple, easy my food is the more time/energy I have to take care of me, my job, etc. I plug away with basically the same meats and veggies, and have been relying on pork side fat for most of my cooking, as it agrees better with me than olive oil. I tried walnut oil, but I really hated it. Not sure why. I always have meat and veggies in the fridge and freezer, oil, pork side fat, and salt and pepper.

Oh, and coffee. I found some brands that I can drink black. I ordered a black coffee to go at a restaurant, and they put cream in, I thought it tasted horrible when I took my first sip, and had gave the rest to my husband. From that small accidental sip, I started getting stuffy/coughing/headachy.

I'm getting back into working out as I fell very hard on the ice (flat on my back/back of head) and have been having physical therapy for the past two weeks, going into my third week. I'm feeling almost 100% better. One thing I want to get back to is having massages again. I haven't had one in since sometime in 2003.

I feel like no one except for my husband still understand why I eat the way I do. My friends and family dont' understand that I can only eat meat & veggies (with relatively nothing else). I've been doing this for some time now, and my mom still brings cookies and cakes and such over when she and my father visit, and she doesn't understand why I just sit and drink black coffee.

Nothing too exciting to post. My clothes are all still roomy, and i'm getting more accustomed to my body. I'm not sure if i'm at goal or not. My weight seems to stay here, unless I cut calories lower, which makes me more hungry more frequently.

I still get PMS, but i've gotten to the point that I just ignore it, try to drink more water, and get more sleep/rest.

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 143

I hope both your recovery from the fall and your job hunt—as well as your weight management journey—are all going well.

I want to address something you mentioned in your last post: I feel like no one except for my husband still understands why I eat the way I do. My friends and family don’t understand that I can only eat meat & veggies (with relatively nothing else). I've been doing this for some time now, and my mom still brings cookies and cakes and such over when she and my father visit, and she doesn't understand why I just sit and drink black coffee.

I’ve addressed this in How Do I Get Other People To Understand?, you might want to re-read that.

But the most important thing I want to remind you of here is that this really does take years for others to get any kind of grasp on. And even then, they’re likely to forget and be surprised at the reminders that you still don’t eat any crap. And/or they’re still a little angry—perhaps even a little passive-aggressive—about it all. This choice of yours really isn’t at all important—or deeply significant—to anyone else. I think that’s a remarkably tough thing for us to keep being reminded of. Still it sometimes will make others uncomfortable. For instance, I’m guessing your mother is a little miffed that you don’t accept her food “gifts”. I’m also guessing she (perhaps inappropriately) is feeling sorry for and trying to help your poor husband, projecting how she would feel if she lived with a (gasp!) non-sugar eating individual. It’s a little twisted when you think about it. (Your husband can come to his own terms with all that, right?) I’ve certainly experienced all that. I mentioned in my post today that we’ll be going to a neighbor’s house tonight to play board/card games (just one other couple). I know she’ll put out food that neither of us will want or eat. She just can’t help herself. She has it in her psyche that she must always provide food to company. I go with a full stomach and I ask for a big glass of ice water every time we go (I’ve told her many times that I don’t eat after dinner). I adore these neighbors, I’ll keep enduring the food (and try to remember to offer it the evenings they come to our house to play).

Keep us posted.

Adele
(144 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 11+ years
Maintaining at goal 8+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

I still am not understood by some friends and family as to why I only eat veggies & meat. I do get people at work remarking how delicious my food looks/smells, better than their Lean Cuisines and what have you.

My husband eats very close to how I eat now, and he deals each week with "the guys" at cards eating chips and stuff, and they ask how come he is lean and doesn't eat that stuff. He's noticed the more he avoids it, the worse he feels now. It's kind of nice making dinner and he partakes in everything I make. Though if he didn't that is the way it goes (and goes now and then).

So nothing earth shattering from me. One thing I noticed though, in looking through my past thread, is that I do just great with raw veggies now. I guess it just took a LONG time to adjust. I actually think I do slightly better on the raw than the cooked. I still like to make my soups year round, even in summer.

It's hard when I need to "bring something" for family or my organizational gatherings. Like tomorrow night at one of my meetings, one person is bringing cheese and crackers, and another some kind of dessert.

I always eat beforehand anyway, but thought of bringing a veggie platter, but they (mostly guys) don't really do veggies, and will have probably eaten dinner anyway, so they probably want a dessert/snack type item. So it's hard to think what the general public likes since i've been eating this way so long.

So, that's my boring post. Not very exciting, but that is how it gets.

Thanks, and enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Elizabeth

----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 139

Although I rarely eat them myself, I usually take deviled eggs pot-lucks. Men especially seem to adore those and wolf them down. I usually bring two kinds—one made with just mayonnaise a little Dijon mustard, a dribble of olive juice, salt to taste, and some extra finely chopped hard boiled eggs to “stretch” the yolk filling, garnished with olive slices. The other kind (often even more popular with the guys) I make with the mayo and mustard seasoned with salt and some cayenne pepper (to taste), and I garnish them with chopped cayenne peppers.

Most people don’t notice or care what I eat at these gatherings, have you noticed that too? I make sure to arrive with a full stomach; then I can enjoy the veggies and the people.

Thanks for checking in, I hope you’ll keep us posted.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 11+ years
Maintaining at goal 8+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Bad news is i'm up 5 pounds, due to not weighing and not tracking in fitday. I blame it on being so busy and stressed out. But I need to weigh again, everyday. Which is a simple thing I need to do.

I'm dealing with being frustrated that I have to keep tracking my food though. I thought that after doing this, this long, that I wouldn't have to do it anymore. But whenever I stop doing it, my weight starts creeping back up.

I mean, it's only meat, fat & veggies. I really thought my body would regulate itself better, so that I wouldn't have to track forever. It's really frustrating. But obviously something I have to do. I'm okay most days, but some days I get frustrated, since I have to eat so strictly, and on top of that, I need to track my macros and calories.

So, as much as I hate it, it looks like I need to track. Forever. Ugh. Well at least I know it works, and that I need to do it to be where I want to be.

Thanks, Elizabeth
----------
Initial Weight: 176
Current Weight: 144

Again? Elizabeth, in my opinion/experience, we cannot ever stop this—it’s bottom-line foundational to an ongoing successful long-term recovery. Not weighing is what sent me back to the land of denial every single time until I finally grew up and took responsibility for this life-long weight problem of mine in my mid-40’s. It’s not a big deal, not at all, it’s less work and takes less time than brushing and flossing my teeth and I sure wouldn’t go to bed at night without doing that.

You might want to ask yourself (rhetorically) WHY you’re fighting this as such an imposition??

I'm dealing with being frustrated that I have to keep tracking my food though. I thought that after doing this, this long, that I wouldn't have to do it anymore. But whenever I stop doing it, my weight starts creeping back up.

Elizabeth, just like you, with no cheating I too was up 4-5 pounds this winter. I went back to Fitday for a month, and it helped get me to really seeing the numbers and how much I was eating. I still need this sometimes. I’ve been at this since 1996 when I started it half-assed, since 1998 when I started doing it in earnest, LWTD style. I still need self-reminders and tiny course corrections. I doubt I’ll ever stop needing them. This isn’t a mission that gets accomplished, it’s part and parcel of learning to manage my highly reactive body through the sea of daily life.

Yes, I’d rather my body behaved like I wished, but it doesn’t, it won’t, it can’t. It hasn’t changed since I began this journey (except to stop the symptoms from the foods I don’t give it any more).

My body hasn’t changed. I have.

I’m glad you’re here, still plugging away, and I hope you’ll keep us posted.

Adele (142 this morning)
----------
168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 11+ years
Maintaining at goal 8+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com