The interesting thing I have noticed lately, is the longer I do this, the cleaner I want to eat. I still eat small amounts of fruit and dairy and still lose well while including them in my diet, but I seem to be losing interest in eating them.

When I look at foods like cakes, bread, cookies, not only do I not have cravings for them...I actually feel disgusted by them.

I was recently at a historical museum in the area, where I took part in a cooking workshop (preparing a dinner authentic to the period (1800's) in the original kitchen with authentic tools/ingredients. I had signed up for this about six months ago. When I arrived there and looked at the menu, I noticed we were to prepare a tea (tea sandwiches, scones, macaroons, and fruit tarts). Later we were to dine on the foods we had prepared.

Well, I was only able to nibble on a bit of cheese and cucumbers from the sandwiches. I was surprised at how easy it was for me to get through this without cheating. I didn't even want to, although I did feel a little awkward sitting there while everyone else was endulging. At one time, I would have cheated making excuses about how there was nothing else to eat.

I am so very grateful that I found this site (thanks Debby for recommending it on another group) and thanks so much Adele for your (sometimes brutally) honest advice and feedback.

Linda
LWTD since Mar 17/06
238/156.6/150

Last Edited Linda150 on 12-Jun-2006 11:34 AM

I’m encouraged to hear what you said in your last post, specifically:

The interesting thing I have noticed lately, is the longer I do this, the cleaner I want to eat.

In my experience, that is EXACTLY where leading with a careful diet will take us (addicted eaters), MOST of the time. And then we can simply handle (abide) the moments when we find ourselves distracted from that mindset.

Then you say:

I still eat small amounts of fruit and dairy and still lose well while including them in my diet, but I seem to be losing interest in eating them.

For what it’s worth, next time you’re ready to tinker, I’d lose the dairy before I lost the fruit. You might be surprised to find that the same thing happens without dairy (that's one that NOBODY wants to let go of) – that when you manage to get all the way off of it you WANT/FEEL a whole lot different about not eating it. Same phenomenon you just noticed: “The longer I do this, the cleaner I want to eat”.

Adele (141 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

I check the message board daily. It truly makes things much easier to know that I am not alone in this and that there is support here when I need it. Cheating is not something that I consider doing. And I don't. It's nice that its that simple.

Dairy? Yes, very hard to let go of, especially when I lose well while eating it. I have been toying with the idea of letting it go for some time now. Not for weight loss, but because I don't feel it's something that is natural for us to eat. I know this, yet I still want it. The hardest thing for me to give up would be milk in my tea, and cream in my coffee. But I hardly seem to want coffee anymore and I could drink tea black I suppose. I eat plain full fat yogurt on occasion, but it makes me cough, so I really don't even know why I eat it. Anyway, apparently I am still bargaining with this. A sure sign that indeed I should let it go.

I honestly don't feel ready to do it. I am afraid to make a commitment that I won't be able to stick to. That this will somehow throw me off balance.

I am very close to goal now (5 pounds) and I am having mixed feelings about it. I know maintenance and LWTD will be an ongoing part of my life forever, but I almost don't want to get there. I worry that I will have no focus once I reach it and may lose motivation. It's almost frightening.

Does anyone else have similar thoughts?

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/155.3/150

Of course you’ll have to decide the dairy issue for yourself, like everything else about this. And yes, I think it would be a difficult thing to even consider if you can lose and maintain at a healthy weight.

I’m with you in that I somewhat inadvertently developed a fairly strong paleo-brain as a part of this journey and I do think that most of us, but especially those of us with compromised health/bodies, just generally seem to do a lot better without any dairy. Seeing one lowcarber after another begin to thrive after dumping it has certainly added fuel to that paleo-leaning mindset.

I guess what I would inject into your thinking about this is some consideration of your overall HEALTH? Especially do you have repeated and/or chronic sinus/ respiratory/ asthmatic, digestive, skin or autoimmune disorders (including diabetes) of any kind? If so, then I think that whether or not you need to consider giving up dairy for weight loss purposes, you might want to at least consider a significant trial run of dairy-free eating just to see what impact it might have on those issues.

Linda, I think there is much separate work to be done on this journey after getting to goal. You would not be the first person I’ve run across who found they did even better taking their diet another step or two purer AFTER getting to goal. (Patricia, are you reading?)

But "hanging out" close to goal and drifting down slowly is not a bad thing. I’d refer you to my post today to Lisa 4-14, much of it applies to you as well, the two of you are at much the same place in the journey.

Adele (143 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

I am doing fine. Still no changes with regard to dairy but I am eating less fruit (berries mostly and only a few times a week). Adele, I am contemplating your suggestion of doing a trial run without the dairy. Actually, I just decided this very minute to do a two week run without any dairy starting Monday.

My weight has been very steady for a month now, fluctuating up and down by no more than a pound and usually settling around 155.3. This is a good sign that I am eating appropriately for the maintenance stage. I notice an ever so slight downward trend happening (maybe 1/2 a pound per month) which is OK. If I stay at this weight, I am fine with that. If I reach 150, OK too.

With weight training a couple days a week, I think my body composition is slowly changing to less body fat, even without any weight change.

I'll report back after the no-dairy run.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/155.25/150

Last Edited Linda150 on 2-Jun-2006 6:03 AM

It's been one week on a dairy free diet, and I'm not liking it very much. I see no marked improvement in my health but
will stick it out for another week and see what happens.

A couple of things I have noticed are decreased nasal congestion (just a little) and the dark circles under my eyes seem to have lightened.

I can do without the yogurt and cheese but I'm really missing the milk/cream in my tea coffee. This past week, I've been drinking mainly green and herbal teas as I prefer them to black regular tea and coffee.

At this point, my weight loss has slowed to at most 1/2 a pound per month and I'm feeling extremely bored with food and literally have to force it down sometimes.

I am concerned that since I have moved to a clean, no-cheat diet, that I actually seem to be degrading in my health. I feel quite lethargic and weak and my performance during cardio and weight training seems to have decreased. I experience burning muscles during weight training and less endurance during cardio. I've been getting migraines and headaches where normally I don't have any.

I am wondering if I have some nutrient deficiencies and have been to my physician for some tests with no results as of yet.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/155.1/150

I can't seem to do it.

I am still dairy free and am getting used to the tea/coffee without it. I definitely don't "love" them as much as I used to which I suppose is a good thing.

So for now, I will continue on without the dairy.

Adele - can you change my thread topic to "Linda's Journey".

Thanks.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/154.5/150

I did it! (Wasn't sure I could, how 'bout that?)

Thanks for the update Linda. I don't have much I can add. You've shared your emerging paleo outlook, which this diet certainly led me to. I don't think it's a bad thing to draw this out longer. I think you could find that if/when you do introduce it, especially if you wait awhile, you'll notice symptoms that come back that you didn't realize were gone until they came back. That's been my experience anyway.

Drinking coffee black was the hardest aspect of this for me as well, if that helps any. That took about a year to change. Drinking black coffee is so much easier socially, if nothing else.

Adele (141 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

I am still dairy free. The weight did start to drop a bit after about the 3rd week (152 today).

One major difference I have noticed is that the bags under my eyes, which were very noticeable and I thought hereditary, are disappearing. I would never have thought this could be related to food.

I was reviewing my log of when I started LWTD and can't believe its been almost 4 months already. I am down 10 pounds since then, with NO cheats and have finally given up all of those foods (well not foods exactly, but things I was consuming) which I planned to when starting i.e. all grains, sugar, legumes, artificial sweeteners including diet pop, dairy and processed/smoked meats.

In March, it seemed unlikely that I could give all these things up. Now it's really no big deal.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/152/150

Sinusitis and post nasal drip are probably the most often-reported, which will often go into severe, chronic respiratory problems if they don’t stop and stay stopped with the dairy. They will often culminate in bronchitis, which needs antibiotics, which will make their candida even worse, if they have it.

Increasing reliance on dairy at maintenance (especially if they had to seriously decrease/eliminate it to lose to goal) will lead to slow but steady regain and noticeably declining health over time for a lot of long-term lowcarbers. That’s an insidious cycle I see people close to or in the first years of maintenance getting into. Yes it’s better than their old patterns, but eventually, slowly they often find they’ve managed to bargain themselves right back off the path. (Regain can happen fast, in an all-or-nothing rage-binge, or it can happen like molasses. The latter is tough to see and acknowledge, but it happens a lot.)

10 pounds in 4 months is a good rate of loss at the place you are in the journey Linda. The last pounds come off very slowly, and generally, at that point, your body decides exactly where it will land. You can sometimes starve it down a little further to meet the number YOU want, but generally, like all calorie-reduced dieting, that eventually will boomerang back and bite you in the butt with regain.

I’m curious whether you’re still including some fruit and doing well/losing. If you are, unless you find yourself beginning to bargain with that over time, then that would be a sign to me that if you do have yeast, it’s not severe. (I do observe that it’s possible to be dairy intolerant and not have serious yeast, but it does not appear possible or likely one can have yeast involvement and not be dairy intolerant.)

I'm glad you're still here Linda. You are now, in my opinion, coasting gently to the make-or-break point with the diet, this journey doesn’t end with reaching goal weight. In almost all respects, getting to goal IS the starting point. (I know people who have a lot of weight to lose HATE to hearing that. I am not saying that losing weight is/was EASY, not at all, but that doesn’t change the fact that maintaining the loss is the challenge that (statistically) undoes the tiny minority of lowcarbers who manage to push through to THAT place. Regain is not only possible, it’s likely, especially in addicted, CRLs. Knowing that in some ways is a helpful, eyes-wide-open kind of thing.

Starting right about where you are now, generally the dragon perks up a bit. He has been patient LONG ENOUGH with you, he’s endured this extreme dietary foolishness of yours, he’s been MIGHTY nice about it in fact. It’s HIS turn now, you OWE him some attention. Just a little, you know, on special occasions, won’t hurt.

Luckily, I kept a copy of your first post here... which somehow did not become and stay a part of “your thread” here (forgive me, I’m still feeling my way through building a straightforward and focused message board.) In that post you said:

Of all the reading, surfing, research, tweaking etc. I have done over my journey, I have come to the realization that I am definitely an addict and it's all or nothing for me. I will never be able to moderate my food intake to allow for the occasional treat. I do best when I eat very clean...meat, eggs, vegetables, some fruit. I still eat dairy and would love to give it up but just haven't been able to. Mostly milk and cream in my tea/coffee as well as plain yogurt. Some cheese. Dairy doesn't seem to be too much of a problem with me as far as over-indulging, but I do have health issues that I suspect would improve without it.

I've been into the sugar-free junk lately and even some sugar! What a mistake this has been. I am obsessing over food again.

I include that here because I thought you might want a reminder of where your dragon is most likely to want you to go and the vehicles he will suggest for taking you back there.

Thank YOU so much for staying here with us. It’s so gratifying—and yes, I think much more motivating to others than a million WTG’s—to see somebody actually taking the babysteps, despite their initial trepidation, and then be able to look and see that a mere four months after you acknowledged your pattern, you’ve made a very significant change, and it’s gotten you someplace you wanted to go.

Stay with us and let’s see this through to a whole different place than you’ve been able to get to in your 4-year-long lowcarb career.

Adele (140 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Yes, I knew about this link between dark circles and allergies, but the disappearing bags really surprised me. My sinuses are indeed getting much clearer (as clear as they can get in steel town (Hamilton, Ontario) :) )

Increasing reliance on dairy at maintenance (especially if they had to seriously decrease/eliminate it to lose to goal) will lead to slow but steady regain

I've made the decision to not reintroduce it, or anything else I've given up to get to this point. It's so clear to me now after four months how much bargaining I did over the last 4 years. It was exhausting! Abstinence really is so much easier.

The last pounds come off very slowly, and generally, at that point, your body decides exactly where it will land. You can sometimes starve it down a little further to meet the number YOU want..

Agreed, I'm eating now what and how much I plan to eat for the rest of my life. Wherever I land is fine with me (as long as it's not more than I am now).

I’m curious whether you’re still including some fruit

Yes I am, a little more than before since I gave up the dairy. I usually have 1 - 2 servings a day. It doesn't seem to be a problem for me as far as causing cravings for other sweets or more fruit. I stick mainly to berries and the odd apple or orange.

In almost all respects, getting to goal IS the starting point.

Yes I hear you. I can honestly say that I have no delusions of ever being able to eat again the way I used to or that anything will change when I reach goal.

Thank YOU so much for staying here with us.

No, Adele, thank you!! I can't even begin to tell you what a HUGE impact you have made in my life. I honestly don't think I would ever have gotten to where I am today had I not found this site. I may have reached goal, but I know I would have always been struggling. I'm not struggling anymore.

Stay with us and let’s see this through to a whole different place than you’ve been able to get to in your 4-year-long lowcarb career.

I'm not going anywhere!
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/152/150

There’s your sign, Linda, there’s your lightbulb click moment. Very similar to mine, I still remember it. It’s all still true. Them-there is Surrendering words!

Keep on swimming Linda!

Adele (140 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

I don't have too much to report. I am still dairy-free except for one small incident where I totally lost my mind and added milk to my tea. I didn't even realize what I did until I went to refill my cup. No harm done.

Until the local fruit came into season, I thought fruit was not an issue for me. Apparently cherries, peaches and blueberries are something I cannot stop eating. I haven't gained as a result, but will keep a close watch on these.

Everything else is running smoothly and I am very close to goal. This last pound is not giving up without a fight.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/150.6/150

Last Edited Linda150 on 1-Aug-2006 10:13 AM

Do you think, as one eats cleaner and cleaner, that we get more in sync with what our paleo-ancestors ate, and hence fruits work better in the WOE when they're in season than not?

When I say I eat fruit, it is primarily berries, cantelope, and some occasional honeydew (if someone else is paying, LOL). Interestingly, pineapple/bananas/oranges don't "feel right" to me.

Rani
176/110

I would think that our paleo ancestors would have gorged on in-season fruit, so I guess my instinct to do this is natural.

While not a huge problem for me, fruit is definitely something I have to watch. Good thing the season is very short here.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
238/150.6/150

At the end of a week's vacation I was entertaining my family when my 18 dd decided to ask her girlfriend if she could back out her car from our driveway (very expensive Audi belonging to her girlfriend's parents). My dd has no driver's license and lost control of the vehicle and smashed into my parents car. Total damage to both vehicles amounted to over $11,000. No insurance coverage since my daughter is not a licensed driver.

Then I find out when questioning her how she will pay for this that she has blown all of her savings for University. Almost $4,000. She starts University in two weeks.

So after stressing about this for two days, I finally go to sleep last night and after a few minutes realize that my sewer is backing up in my finished basement from under our ceramic tiles.

Yikes. I feel sick.

Still through all of this, I haven't considered going off plan. It is the one stable thing in my life right now and I am so thankful that I have this.

By the way, I met goal on Aug 4 and have been fluctuating just below it ever since.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At goal Aug 4/06
238/149.5/150

I am doing well, eating on plan, and a little under goal. I am struggling a bit with maintenance i.e. I'm losing (very slowly) still and although I know I don't really need to, deep down I still want to. After so many years of trying to lose, it's pretty hard to stop.

My weight loss is minimal at this point, but over the course of a year I could see me dropping another 10 pounds if I don't change something. I am currently a size 6 at 5' 10".

I suppose this is just something I will have to adjust to (maintenance).

148 today.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

Try to avoid the temptation to keep losing past a healthy weight and bodyfat percentage, Linda, that usually eventually sets up a boomerang weight gain reaction.

You need to go ahead and face the next part of the journey which is what I term the retrofitting—coming to terms with what losing weight did and did not change about you and your life, as well with how your eating is going to be for the rest of your life if you are to maintain this loss and move around in your society in a body that appears normal to others. Wanna talk about this?

Adele (142 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 9+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

It’s about reconciling what IS real, what is do-able and what is imperfect, but plenty good enough.

This hit home with me. I'm having great difficulty settling for "good enough" and living with my imperfections.

I had dropped a few pounds below goal, went back up to .5 pound over, then down again today. I really hated seeing that scale jump back up to 150.5.

I know I can adjust my eating to stop the weight loss (I eat winter squash, nuts, fruit etc.). The problem is, I don't really want to.

It's almost as if I have switched addictions...from food to weight loss.

148 today.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

No kidding Linda—see what I posted to Orvette today, about addictive personalities.

While being addicted to weight loss is certainly not the same kind of problem as being addicted to alcohol, to me the weight loss on this journey does serves as a substitute-pay-off “thrill” to addicted eaters. Then when we finally reach goal, yikes, the thrill is gone!

Here is what I’ve observed about myself and others, and where/how I think people go askew with this. Any addiction is a way we develop to keep our brains and emotions from going where we don’t want them to go—we think we can’t “let” them go there because they are scary and/or painful places, and we develop all kinds of ways to stop the intrusive thoughts. (In that sense, I do suspect that anorexia is essentially an addiction to weight LOSS—see Leigh’s journey for a glimpse of how she’s had a slightly different—yet eerily similar—approach to dealing with HER emotions.)

Your old, life-long pattern was to eat crap to stop these uncomfortable thoughts. So to me your choice now is to go ahead and think/feel them or to escalate whatever you choose to do to block yourself from going anywhere near them. This, in my opinion, is where it gets REALLY problematic for those of us who have other active addictions, such as smoking or alcohol, but certainly can include non-substance behaviors such as gambling, shopping or sex. There are also those who are bargaining with lowcarb addictive foods—those who have managed to get their weight off but did it by keep themselves on the diet by bargaining/playing games with different forms of food methadone (usually dairy products, artificial sweeteners, alcohol, nuts, sometimes fruits, etc.)

To me, physical or psychological, an addiction is at its very core NOISE (distraction) we make in our heads/bodies. Our culture in America, especially in the post World War II years, has become increasingly noisy. So it’s sort of effortless to come to the belief that this noise is, well, if it’s not GOOD, then it’s certainly NORMAL, right?

But if you look at it a little more closely, most of the noise comes via the media and advertising, it’s a near-constant barrage of messages that we don’t measure up, we aren’t quite good enough, that we are WANTING in some significant way(s)—ways that will, or perhaps have already, cause us to be rejected on some level. (Because if they can’t convince us that we’re unhappy or lacking, how in the world can they sell us a solution?)

So Linda, do you have any ideas why you might “need” noise or distraction? Do you have any idea where it is emotionally that you won’t/can’t go honey, what rejection you might fear the most? That’s a rhetorical question...you can answer here if you want, if you think that will help, but I think it’s most important that you begin exploring this for yourself.

Thanks for keeping us posted, I hope you’ll keep that up.

Adele (142 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

I've been thinking over the last few weeks about what feelings I might be trying to distract myself from. I'm still not sure, but the only thing that makes sense to me at this point is trying to distract myself from boredom. All I do know is how I feel when I exhibit addictive behaviour. I feel as if I'm looking for something rather than avoiding something. Looking to feel a different way...? I dunno.

Foodwise I have been very stable. I still get tempted at times, but never enough to cheat.

I'm a little worried about November. I am going on my first cruise for 10 days and I'm afraid I may get stuck places on the islands with nothing legal to eat. Any advice here?

147 today.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

Linda, first I’m so sorry I missed this thread on my last big “catch-up” day! I meant to reply then.

I suppose it depends somewhat on what type/size cruise ship you’re sailing on, as well as which islands you are visiting and how long your off-ship excursions will last. But, especially since you’re able to include some fruit in your eating, I doubt you’ll encounter much difficulty; you should be able to take some fruit from the ship along with you if your excursion is very long. Also, if you can include nuts at least occasionally, it would probably not be a bad idea to pack a pound of raw nuts in your suitcase for such occasions. Those along with fruit should hold you well. That’s what I rely on when I travel like that. I can do occasional almonds now, although it took me it took me 5-6 years at goal before I could handle them and truly limit myself to a small serving. And I can ONLY do raw almonds, no others—not that I’ve tried any others in years. (Pecans were always my binge-nut, almonds were never a favorite of mine, and btw, I only eat them raw, unsalted, unpeeled, that is, as close to their natural state as possible.)

My husband and I went on a cruise a couple of years ago and I was fine that way. Our off-ship excursions were fairly short—no more than 3 hours, I don’t remember that we ate any meals off the ship? (We went to the Dominican Republic, San Juan, St. Thomas and a very short stop (4 hours, I think it was) in Jamaica. I didn’t even get off the ship that time.)

The food on the ship was terrific, plentiful and to-order. Our room-attendant/waiter noticed the first day that we didn’t eat the plate of finger sandwiches and cookies they brought about tea-time, and asked if there was something we’d like better. The rest of the cruise he brought a plate of raw vegetables and Italian Dressing “dip,” and of course we gobbled those down (I don’t eat dressing, but DH did). Another thing I wish I’d been savvy enough to think of, luckily a diner at our evening dinner table taught me the first day. She ordered a large serving of broccoli (a dinner plateful) to be brought along with her dinners because otherwise the veggie portions were not enough. Then she always offered to share it, and it always got eaten.

I believe most cruise lines can and will do just about whatever you ask, food-wise.

Adele (142 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 6+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

With 8 months of Leading with the Diet, I honestly don't even consider cheating anymore. I was down one pound the day I got back.

One funny from the cruise....I was eating my usual breakfast of boiled eggs and fruit when I noticed a woman standing next to my table staring at me. I thought she was just waiting for her husband, but when I glanced up at her she said "do you ALWAYS eat that many eggs at one sitting?" I said yes (there were 4 eggs) and she indignantly says "I could NEVER eat more than one. They are so filling!". Meanwhile she has on her tray: one egg, bacon, yogurt, granola, fruit, danish, juice and coffee. Yes, I guess that one egg would be filling! It never ceases to amaze me how my way of eating really seems to bother other people!

I am slowly getting used to the idea of maintenance and being "good enough". I am having to eat more carbs to maintain my weight (nuts, fruit, chestnuts etc.)and they don't seem to cause cravings for me.

Not much else to report....

149 today
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

I thought it was time I get honest with myself and admit that I am still an emotionally addicted eater, although I never "cheat" and always eat low carb (and mostly paleo).

I have been bargaining by saying that in order to maintain my goal weight, I "need" to eat certain things like nuts. A co-worker shares her almonds (she brings in a huge bag) with me during breaks twice daily and I always eat much more than I should, then continue to pick at them all day if she leaves them at her desk. Every day I tell myself that I will not have any, but I do.

I can eat them and stay at goal, but I don't like the addictive behaviour they bring out in me, nor do I like the fact that I continue to eat for pleasure. I could easily pick at food all day long.

I already avoid buying nuts for home, which seems to work, but having them accessible to me on a daily basis is definitely a problem. It's not that I'm hungry, since I do bring my own snacks to work as well.

Still struggling at goal,
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

Linda, ALL of the above is true of me too. Still.

As I’ve hinted throughout this thread and others, a new struggle really begins when you get to goal.

Now you’re trying to bargain within the bounds of paleo with the nuts. I did the exact same thing too until I put on 6 pounds after getting to goal. Then I had to quit the nuts. (Likewise with Connie, if that helps.)

Nuts are big time bargaining chips most addicted eaters will try to play with in the early stages of maintenance.

Five years later on a trip I found I could occasionally eat some raw almonds. But I have to watch them like a hawk.

You’ll have to figure your own way through this, your body does not seem as highly reactive as many I have seen or worked with. But if you can’t limit any food, “legal” or not, generally it’s time to cut it off for a long spell, if not forever. It goes back to the addict’s lament of “Complete abstinence is easier than perfect moderation” (St. Augustine)

Keep us posted honey.

Adele (144 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Last Edited on 11-Dec-2006 6:07 PM

The holidays went well for me generally. I ate on plan as usual with no significant temptations. I did get into the dried fruit, dates and prunes, which I know I should not eat, but did. I ate an entire large container of Medjool dates in less than a week.

I started to write "I will avoid buying these in future" and realized what I am still doing.....bargaining. I know I cannot eat them in moderation and need to give them up, yet the addict in me is struggling to hold on to this last "sweet" treat. I am actually sitting here struggling to write that I will give them up. It seems when I put it in writing here, then I stick to it. Yet I am having a hard time doing just that. I don't want to.

I am still below goal, but still eating compulsively when not hungry, especially in the evenings. It seems lately that I am never satisfied. Perhaps I need to up my fat intake and decrease my fruit. This seems to help.

I have also been slacking off on working out. Today will be my first workout since mid-December. I hope to get back to my usual 5 days per week routine.

147 today.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

How's you're wrestling match with the dried fruit? I have seen fruits undo more than one "successful" lowcarber--certainly not all, but given your history, I'd be especially wary of dried ones. For the more seriously addicted among us, fruits can sure seem like a healthy bargain, and therefore, you know, not really a bargain at all, huh?

Adele (144 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

Things are holding steady for me foodwise. I have actually dropped a few pounds due to many stressful situations going on in my life right now (personal, work, house, deaths,....it's like I've been hit from all sides at the same time). I'm not a stress eater....at least, I don't seem to be anymore.

Anyway, with the firm foundation I have built with my food choices over the past year, I have not wavered once. It is just not an option for me anymore and something I never contemplate. I'm off the dried fruits ..eat them in small amounts out of the house, but not so much at home. They tend to give me a stomach ache, so they're not so appealing any more.

I actually need to gain back a little, I'm almost down to 143 at 5'10". Too low. I'm dealing with alot of comments from friends/family about gaining back some weight. I know they mean well, but it's getting tiresome.

It's difficult to add things back in that I have not been eating, and don't want to go anywhere near grains or sugar or dairy for that matter. I eat the odd legume here and there but they make me feel unwell.

I've been considering adding a small sweet potato to my daily intake to stabilize my weight. I've been exercising regularly and find it helps immensely with the stress levels.

So, I'm hanging in there....still reading the message board several times a week. Will get back to my daily read when things settle down.

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/143.6

Today's weight: 144.

Hope to catch up on all the posts and be participate more here.

That's it for now.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/144/150

I’m so impressed. Thanks for sticking around, please stay in touch.

Adele (143 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

My diet is extremely stable and I haven't cheated once since March 17, 2006. Not one bite (of what I consider a cheat..grains, dairy, sugar, potatoes). Feels good to say that. I know I don't, and won't ever, have it beat. I do, on the rare occasion, almost talk myself into a little something....a little bite of 85% cocoa chocolate or something like that, trying to justify that there is less sugar in that then fruit. I know that's a slippery slope.

I do eat fruit and nuts in addition to my protein/veggies. They're not a problem for me (although nuts still tend to put me into a tiny binge...a few handfuls where one would do). My weight is stable.

I have not been exercising. That is where I am losing motiviation right now. I was dropping a bit too much weight from stress and used that as an excuse to exercise less, then stop altogether. Bad I know.

That's it for now. Will work on getting back into the exercise routine. I am feeling the effects from the lack of it. Very sluggish.

Oh, and I'm not weighing every day as I once was. Maybe only once a week or so. Weight this week...around 142.

Huh, just noticed from my signature that I missed my "at goal" anniversary. Hmm..it's nice to finally not be so obsessed with my weight and/or food. Almost like a "normal" person.

Bye for now.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150

I won't bore anyone with the details. Normally, years ago, food would have been the number one comfort for me. I honestly can say that I don't even go there anymore. That's sounds weird even to myself.

When you have time, I’d certainly enjoy being bored, not necessarily by the details or the source(es) of your stress, but by what you think are some of the details of how you’ve been able to stop turning to food in an attempt to deal with the stress. I think this is a huge part of the retrofitting I’ve been talking about recently with Suzi and Laina, and perhaps because you are still either in the process of changing or at least it’s been so much more recent with you, perhaps you can help illuminate from a different perspective the changes you feel happening as you continue to stay on the abstinent path.

Arlene, now more than 3 years at goal, mentioned in her most recent post that she still sometimes feels the URGE to medicate, I’ve said many times that I still do too. I’d be curious to hear if you find you still WANT to medicate and just don’t, or that the want to do that is practically gone?

Thanks again for staying present here. When I get overwhelmed and frustrated, it helps...it really does.

Adele (140 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 10+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

The stress is still very much there in my life and I don't think it's going anywhere anytime soon. How do I deal with it without turning to food? I'm not sure but I think it's simply that the foods I eat now are not comforting.

Here is what I've noticed changing by remaining abstinent:

I still think a lot about food (mostly in planning my meals ) but don't obsess about it.
I don't use food as entertainment anymore. Eating out in restaurants is a rare occasion now.
My weight is very steady for the first time in my life.
I still don't know what issues I had/have which made me turn to food in the first place. Not sure that I ever will.

Self-medicating? sometimes I will get the urge to literally shove my face into a big creamy piece of cake....a huge piece and just devour it. so YES, I still get the urge sometimes.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/143/150

So Linda, I think the newer and the strugglers here might like to hear why it is you think you DON’T just go ahead and devour that cake? What holds you back? What’s different this time? (so far?)

Adele (141 this morning)
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168/140, Size 16/8
Lowcarbing 11+ years
Maintaining at goal 7+ years
Moderator/Owner
adele@leadwiththediet.com

One bite and i'm done for.

It's just not worth it. It doesn't taste THAT good.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/142/150

Its been almost two years since my last cheat. At one time, that would have impressed even me. Now its just routine. I really don't think about it much anymore.

My weight has fluctuated a little...eating a bit too much, not exercising enough. Still under my goal though so I'm not worried. I need to weigh a little more regularly, Have fallen off on that a bit.

I haven't resolved any of the personal issues I am going through yet, but haven't turned to food for comfort. I would be lying if I said it didn't cross my mind.

Funny...I just glanced down to my signature...starting weight 238. You know, I don't even remember being there anymore. That's a nice feeling.

145 Today.
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Linda
LWTD Mar 17/06
At Goal Since: Aug 4, 2006
238/150/150